Abstinence Only vs. Comprehensive Sex Education

[tropicsgoddess]

This is big hot topic issue these days, especially after Bristol Palin's pregnancy and birth of her son Tripp and with her coming from a conservative family. Some say abstinence only education is the best method of sex education, but there are others like myself who disagree. I favor comprehensive sex education because not only does it stress abstinence but teaches about the different methods of birth control and personal responsibility. Being abstinent is the 100% fool-proof method to prevent unwanted pregnancies and STD's, but also knowing how to prevent them from happening is even better. Abstinence only sex education is basically saying "don't have sex" but not saying WHY you shouldn't have sex. Knowledge and personal responsibility are the keys to having safe sex and preventing STD's and unwanted pregnancies. What is your take on sex education?

[kiwi]

My vote is for comprehensive sex education

[AdminAssistant]

Comprehensive is the only way to go.

Bristol Palin is now an 'advocate' for abstenince-only sex ed, because it apparently worked so well in her case.

[Slytovhand]

Abstinence is the most logical and rational way to prevent STD's and pregnancy. Therefore, teaching abstinence-only is the most logical and rational education program.

Hormones don't run on logic or rationale....

'Nuff said!

[MystyGlyttyr]

My mom (imagine that, my PARENTS actually taught me this stuff) kind of went down the middle. She laid out everything for me, said "sex can do this and this and cause this and doing this can do that." Then she said "But if you don't have sex, you never have to worry about any of that." Pretty well done the way she did it. Build up the tension, then offer a release. (It's a pun, see. LOL)

However, my parents ALSO raised me to be my own person, to shun peer pressure and to not feel like I ever had to do anything to "fit in" or what have you. Which, for teenagers, is a much bigger issue than what they see as "can't happen to me" threats of STDs and babies. THAT is the problem that really needs to be tackled down and hard. You can tell a couple of 14-year-olds all you want about bad sex stuff, but if their boy/girlfriend puts the pressure to them, that all goes out the window in favor of "wanna be liked".

[guywithashovel]

When I was in high school, I went to a church youth group where the leaders told us, not in so many words, that premarital sex would foul up our lives forever and make Jesus cry. Often, they would make us play these role playing games where we would pair up in twos, pretending to be couples. One person in the couple would pretend to pressure the other person into having sex, and the other person would come up with ways to counter his or her advances. Another time, we played this game where the youth pastor wrote down a bunch of hypothetical scenarios on tiny pieces of paper and put them in a box. All of us kids had to take turns drawing those scenarios out of the box and discussing with the group ways to deal with them. The scenarios included things like

1. We had sex and now I'm pregnant.
2. We had sex and now I have an STD.
3. My boyfriend says he's going to dump me and tell everyone I have an STD if we don't have sex.

After I grew up and stopped going to that youth group, I spent some time working at a big box retail store in town where I often saw many of the kids that I had gone to youth group with. And do you know something I noticed? At least eighty percent of those kids were married by the time they were 20.

Now, I'm sure that many of them cared about their new (and young) spouses. But I can't help but wonder if the main reason they got married so soon was because they wanted to have sex without guilt. In some ways, that might be good. I mean, hey, it's nice to meet the love of your life when you're young, so you can spend your entire adult lives together. But at the same time, I wonder if those marriages might get rocky later on, due to them starting so early. I'm actually glad I didn't get married when I was 19, 20, or even 21. Many of my core beliefs have changed since then, and I really am a quite different person now than I was just that short time ago. If I had married someone then, I'm not sure if things would be too pleasant now.

[Talon]

It's a complete non-issue.

Abstinence-only education doesn't work. This has been proven by the 2008 Johns Hopkins study, and elsewhere.

I shudder to think of how much money the former Bush administration squandered on this garbage.

[fireheart17]

And what's the chance that abstinence-only education will result in unplanned pregnancy anyway because of the lack of education about other forms of birth control?

I remember going through 4 years of sex. ed. all four years covered birth control in some form. Year 7 we were given a condom to feel and one of the girls actually blew it up like a balloon. Year 8 and 9 we had to use cucumbers to practice with. That put me off cucumbers for months. But we were thoroughly taught about the various forms of birth control, STI's and pregnancy. There were only two things that made me laugh through sex ed: (actually three things)

1) Doing the "slang" terms for various words in our first lesson. We came up with some rather interesting expressions. Afterwards we'd tear it up and be required to use the correct terms in sex. ed.
2) In year 7, there was a rumour going around prior to the first class that the male-only class would be making plasticine models of the male reproductive system. Being a bunch of 12 and 13 year olds at the time...well....
3) Year 7-9, we were required to watch a video called "what's happening to me?" which basically talked about puberty. Guess what made us all laugh? The guy on the diving board about to dive in when "boi-oi-oing!" He tents his boardies.

[Seshat]

Comprehensive.

In fact, I go further. I would like the comprehensive sex ed to include the fact that sex can (can not will) be an incredibly intimate, bonding experience that really affects how you feel about a person. And that it can also be an incredibly violating experience that really affects how you feel about a person - and about yourself.

I'd also like relationship education. And education that - as others have expressed - guides people about standing up for their own decisions and preferences.

There's no reason that comprehensive sex ed can't cover the simple fact that abstinence is the most reliable way not to get pregnant, not to get an STD, and not to get that incredibly violating experience. Because hey, it IS.
The proportion of people who are raped is much lower than the proportion of people who get unplanned pregnancies/stds/feel awful from consensual sex. (*)

But if I'm responsible for teens at any point, they're getting comprehensive. They'll know so much about sex, drugs, & rock-and-roll they'll be sick of hearing about it.


(*Source: personal experience/what I know from friends, not any studies. If anyone has a link to a study on the topic, feel free to either confirm or rebut me.)

[blas87]

Abstinence only will only make the teenage pregnancy epidemic even worse.

Kids need to be informed of their options. That sex is an adult thing that comes with a lot of responsibility and there can be serious consequences if you aren't safe and smart about it.

But throwing the Bible and God and Baby Jesus into it just makes things worse, and more kids will go out and have unprotected sex, because all they know about sex is that it's "bad" and will make God kill kittens.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Abstinence only sex education is basically saying "don't have sex" but not saying WHY you shouldn't have sex.

Another problem is that the "Why" is generally morality-based, and morality is a subjective thing. Some people believe sex outside of marriage is wrong and others don't. In general, the morality aspect of abstinence only sex ed is rooted in certain religious perspectives. If you want to wait because that's what's right for you, then fine. Personally I don't think it's wrong to have sex just because you're not married. What I do think is wrong is to have indiscriminate sex without knowing how to protect yourself and your partner.

[Sylvia727]

But throwing the Bible and God and Baby Jesus into it just makes things worse, and more kids will go out and have unprotected sex, because all they know about sex is that it's "bad" and will make God kill kittens.

No, no, no, God kills a kitten every time you masturbate.

Which, actually, was the main problem I had with my (religious) abstinence only sex ed-- they said masturbation was a sin. Um, I don't see any dead kittens around my neighborhood. :p Masturbation can be very healthy for schoolchildren. No reason to ban it as far as I can see. Of course, I got comprehensive sex ed from my mom, so I probably didn't have the same problems with it as my classmates.

[AFPheonix]

Fortunately, Obama agrees with what multiple scientific studies have shown about the results of various types of sex ed:
http://thinkprogress.org/2009/05/07/obama-abstinence-budget/

[blas87]

Masturbation is actually very healthy.

I remember growing up, my mother used the religion and the old school moral values on me. Come to find out, my dad wasn't her "first", so she really had no right to bring God into it and tell me that sex was a SIN if you weren't married. I can understand a parent not wanting their child to repeat their mistakes....but that really, really irked me.

When I'm going to buy clothes or a car, I gotta try them out first. Well, you can buy clothes that don't fit and take them back, but you can't just divorce a guy the next day because he has ED. I'm not going to marry a guy not knowing how big/small his pecker is, or if he has no idea how to maneuver his hands and tongue in my girly zones or if he has a real problem getting it up, or if he's a one pump chump.

[Greenday]

I'm not going to marry a guy not knowing how big/small his pecker is, or if he has no idea how to maneuver his hands and tongue in my girly zones or if he has a real problem getting it up, or if he's a one pump chump.

You wouldn't buy a car without test-driving it...

Abstinence only education is a waste of time. People are still going to have sex no matter what you tell them to do, so you might as well educate them on how to do it safely.

Don't be a fool, wrap your tool!

[tabbyblack13]

I think comprehensive is the only way to go. Leave religion out of education.

I have read that absents only teaching actually increased riskier behavior in sexual intercourse. I believe that I read it on either Yahoo news or CNN.com that more dentists are reporting STDs. Has anyone else read it too?

I had comprehensive when I was in High school. It was mostly about the mechanics of sex and the prevention of STDs and pregnancy. My Mom also had me watch a video about safe sex practices and the use of a verity of birth control. Absents was in there as well. Mostly to state as an option. The woman on the video also talked about respecting yourself and peer pressure adding onto the decision to have sex.

[unholypet]

My Mom was the one who gave me the talk. I was 2 and asked how my baby sister got in there, and was given the "a mommy and daddy love each other, and have sex, and then if it things happen a certain way, a baby is made."

Then, at 8 (when a girl in my class had a baby and moved off), I was given the not-until-you're married is best and this is why, with facts about STDs and pregnancy.

Then, she left me alone unless I had a question.

I HATED the idea of intimacy until 17.
--------------

I went to a school, where girls and guys were caught thrice a week doing crap on school grounds. During school! The school education was not to do it, for religious reasons! I was one of four girls who were virgins.

Why does a school have the right to say that?

Granted, Tennessee is in the Bible belt. Did you know that 76% of all five local schools have pregnant girls? The guys that have impregnanted a girl are a staggering 89%!!!


Abstinence is horse shit. Especially since 35% of the SIXTH GRADERS locally are now pregnant or had a kid.

[AdminAssistant]

I have read that absents only teaching actually increased riskier behavior in sexual intercourse. I believe that I read it on either Yahoo news or CNN.com that more dentists are reporting STDs. Has anyone else read it too?

I've heard that,too...and I've met people who believe that oral sex isn't 'real' sex so you don't have to take the same precautions.

[Lace Neil Singer]

I've heard that,too...and I've met people who believe that oral sex isn't 'real' sex so you don't have to take the same precautions.

Worse; I read an article in a magazine where girls were quoted as saying they'd had anal sex so as not to get pregnant. -.- One girl ended up catching an STD cuz of it; she never even knew you could catch them thru oral or anal sex as well as thru "real", ie vaginal sex.

The sex ed I had at school was complete shit. The fifty year old science teacher mumbled a few things about "Don't have sex til you're married" and "Boys can tell if you're not a virgin", showed us the periods video that we'd all seen in our last year in primary school, then gave us some condoms to put on bananas. The condoms ended up filled with water and chucked at some passing first years, and at least three girls in my year ended up leaving cuz they were pregnant.

I got all my information on sex from the special sealed sex sections (always avoid alliteration! O_o) in magazines like Sugar and Bliss. There were girls in my year who believed that if you had sex standing up, you wouldn't get pregnant, and if you douched yourself with Coke afterwards, that would kill any sperm left inside you. -__- I'm all for better sex ed than that, for all kids.

[Greenday]

There were girls in my year who believed that if you had sex standing up, you wouldn't get pregnant, and if you douched yourself with Coke afterwards, that would kill any sperm left inside you. -__- I'm all for better sex ed than that, for all kids.

If you jump up and down afterwards, it kills all the sperm.

[tabbyblack13]

if you douched yourself with Coke afterwards, that would kill any sperm left inside you.

I thought it was Mountain Dew.

[Greenday]

I thought it was Mountain Dew.

Diet coke is the most effective according to snopes.

http://www.snopes.com/cokelore/sperm.asp

[Dreamstalker]

Mountain Dew is supposed to lower sperm count.

[Lace Neil Singer]

Diet coke is the most effective according to snopes.

http://www.snopes.com/cokelore/sperm.asp

Damn, beat me to it. XD Yep, it was diet Coke that was considered the best thing to use. No mention at all of such irrelevancies as the pill or condoms, or best yet, keeping your legs closed. *ahem*

[Slytovhand]

The condoms ended up filled with water and chucked at some passing first years, and at least three girls in my year ended up leaving cuz they were pregnant.

Something tells me there was more than just water in those condoms if girls ended up pregnant!!

[Lace Neil Singer]

The problem was, they didn't use condoms; instead, they douched with Diet Coke and stood up to have sex.

Is that even possible? O_o Well, without rupturing something.

[AFPheonix]

No one says you have to face each other to stand ;)

[Flyndaran]

The way to combat bad behavior is through knowledge, not forced ignorance.
Though I don't like the idea that "my" parents did bad things as kids so they shouldn't say I can't do the same.
If I had anger issues and killed someone when I was 8 does that mean I can't tell my kids that killing is wrong?
The fact that I didn't have sex until I was 24 doesn't make me any more or less moral than those that did.... Besides as a born atheist it sure as heck wasn't Jesus killing kittens that stopped me. :)

[fireheart17]

The problem was, they didn't use condoms; instead, they douched with Diet Coke and stood up to have sex.

Is that even possible? O_o Well, without rupturing something.

the standing up part? I think it is possible, can't say whether I've tried it or not :p but I think that the idea is to go SLOWLY...

The myths/unsafe practices I've heard are:

-Using cling wrap instead of condoms, or a chocolate bar wrapper and rubber band. (ow!)
-If it's the first time, you won't get pregnant.
-If it's during your period, you won't get pregnant.
-If I pull out just before I ejaculate, you won't get pregnant. (pre-cum anyone?)
-Using Coke or something similar as a douche.
-Smoking menthol or other cigarettes make you sterile. (not impotent, STERILE)
-Having a hot bath after sex.
-Taking aspirin (wtf?) to stop pregnancy.
-Having sex in certain positions (standing up among them)
-Having sex in the bathtub, spa or pool. (oh ewwww)
-One that was a bit popular a few years back was that if you drink yourself stupid on a repeated basis that you're infertile.

There are a few others, I can't remember then all.

[kiwi]

(pre-cum anyone?)

yes please :D

[Greenday]

yes please :D

Oh, kiwi, you naughty, naughty girl ;)

[Boozy]

-If I pull out just before I ejaculate, you won't get pregnant. (pre-cum anyone?)

If the man truly withdraws before ejaculating, the odds are astronomically low that pregnancy will result from pre-ejaculate entering the vagina.

They may have finally dispelled this myth once and for all:

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12286905

[crazylegs]

-Using cling wrap instead of condoms,

I've heard of some uses for cling film, but never THAT before!

[Nyoibo]

I just read a joke about this.

"I have an idea to lower teenage pregnancy rates in the US.

Replace the current sex education in our schools with porn.

It would mean the girls would accept anal as the normal and the boys would know to pull out and cum on the girls tits."

I thought about it and suddenly realised, hell it's not like it could do any worse.

[Lace Neil Singer]

Why not advocate homosexuality instead as the norm? Then there will be no pregnancies. XD Plus everyone will be more tolerant.