Blaming the man for misguided sex...

[Greenday]

The letter does come off as a way of making her feel better about it by blaming him for everything. But basically, the whole letter is about a how a guy was having a NSA relationship with her, stated it to her, and she lied to herself thinking it could be more.

I know sex makes a lot of people develop feelings for whoever they have sex with, but those people need to realize not everyone is like that and need to stop thinking that someone will like them just because of sex.

The author lied to herself about the situation, got hurt because of it, then got revenge because she didn't get what she wanted.

[Andara Bledin]

I've fixed the first link, but it doesn't really provide much additional info, just that it was originally published in 2000.

I have no judgment on the 14-year-old. It's quite possible that he was just very enthusiastic about poetry with her and she and her parents took it the wrong way because that's usually the default assumption, which is part of the problem you've brought up.

As for the other, from what I understand, they started talking while she was 16, and the relationship didn't actually progress until she was legal. So, it's possible that he just knows to keep it in his pants until he can't be prosecuted for having sex with an underage girl. It's also possible that she pushed for a relationship with him, he was foolish enough to go with it, and she changed her mind after and rather than accept that she chose it, she's going to smear him rather than face her own parents, which happens far more often than it should.

^-.-^

[PepperElf]

hmm. interesting.

the two articles claim that the LW i wrote about was 16 at the time of the affair. however in her own interview she claimed to be 17.

and the "romeo sir" article sounds dreadfully biased claiming he was "forced to marry his nurse". this sounds a bit like a tabloid article rather than a news report.

and again yes, they have no suits over the "14 year old" so there's no telling if it was truth, or something less than what it's claimed.


and i also know that some girls that age DO talk shit sexually. i'm thinking my own classmates actually. we had a new teacher who wasn't that bad looking, in a kind of stuffy way. the girls would try flirting with him by handing him notes that read ... i forget, something about the paper being sex and that they were having sex with him though him touching the paper. (He was pissed off when he read the note).

Their claim.... they were using the woman's school locker room as a changing room. and that he walked in on them on purpose knowing they were naked. they seriously tried to fuck his career over on that. the thing is... those lockers were NOT changing rooms. the girls were just using that section of the school to change, fully knowing it was against the rules. He was going there to yell at them ... not to oogle their 8th grade bodies.

so yeah, i'm not saying the 14 year old story is fake... i'm just saying i know some girls that age who would talk shit, not caring if it destroys someone's life or not.

[PepperElf]

the first link seems broken.

the others... am going to start reading them now. will update after reading.

[Andara Bledin]

As to this case, it appears that it was news back in 2000.

Archived article from the original allegation
Another archived article from later that year
An archived article from the next year
An archived article mentioning his removal for misconduct, but nothing further

The article at The Mail Online is actually from 2003, and illustrates why I hate, with a passion, news sites that don't date their articles as part of the byline. It's sloppy and there's no excuse for it.

As for Brian Bacon, while he lost his teaching position, no charges appear to have ever been levied and the claims regarding the 14-year-old never included sex and the parents refused to "put their daughter through a trial."

^-.-^

[PepperElf]

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/ar...virginity.html


Now before I start on this one, understand that I *DO NOT* condone the practice of an adult teacher fucking a high school (or equivalent) student, even if the student is legally of age.


That being said... I do have some issues with this article.


In a nutshell, the author (now 22) entered into a sexual affair with her teacher at age of 17. Although in my own home state that would make her still a minor, in England that's the age of consent.

She goes on to say how he emotionally abused her by taking advantage of her young hormones and stringing her along in the relationship. Although apparently the first time they had sex he DID tell her, "This is just sex" and "not to confuse it with anything more."




My issue with the article is this...

Nothing he did to her was illegal. Even being her teacher wasn't illegal - sure he'd (rightfully) get fired for it but ... he wouldn't go one single day in jail for seducing her. He didn't get her drunk, he didn't get her stoned... he just convinced her to have a sexual affair with him and then broke her heart when he dumped her.

yes that hurts. Yes sometimes you want "justice" to compensate for the pain of a broken heart.


However... trying to trash him 5 years later? Is this the right way to do it?


And what about this?

"I have since discovered that he had already left one school over an alleged affair with a 14-year-old."

O RLY? I can't find anything on google about him being charged with pedophilia. Or is this part of the "revenge for breaking her heart" plan... spread rumors that will destroy his family & any other career he has? I mean if someone finds a link about this - other than her claim - I'll acknowledge it but... so far all I've found was her claim.



I just can't help and think that...

1) If he hadn't been her teacher she would have no recourse against him for seducing her, other than gossip and playing games. He'd just be some man who broke her heart.

2) If he hadn't dumped her in the first place, would she have ever written this public letter about him? I can't help but wonder if she's doing this to sooth her ego, and perhaps punish him for daring to use her for sex. And perhaps as a means to tell herself that she did nothing wrong cos it's all "his fault".



note: I don't know how old this was. i thought it was recent but she claims he was barred from teaching in 2001 so ... maybe it's older than I realized at first. anyway, it just seems ... odd...