There is only one path for success

[jackfaire]

I am a 29 year old college dropout father of a beautiful 8 year old girl, who writes in his spare time and works a job he loves. The world would call me a failure because of this.

Why is it that only money and a big name job is the only thing considered success.

In all honesty I believe the only true success is if your happy. If your miserable doing what your doing then your not doing so good I don't care if your a CEO if your unhappy then you have not had a successful life. Yet continuously I am told how I should be striving for "more".

Is it possible I am wrong and maybe money and cars and fame are the only important things in life? What do you all think?

[joe hx]

One of my coworkers back when I worked at the autoshop often had his family ask him if he was ever going to get a "real job."

This guy's a damned good mechanic. I think he makes about $14 flat rate and he gets the job done right. But since he doesn't have a college degree and a fancy job, he's not, in their eyes, successful.

He does alright. He just got out of a two year marriage and has a son from that marriage. Failure? Sure, but I think he does what he can and, for the most part, is successful.

Be happy and be successful, I guess.

[Kimmik]

Oh damn I love this one... You should go to college... :rolleyes:

First of all not everyone is inclined to go to college. Some because they do not want to spend more time at school or others because higher education is not for them.

If we all went to college or aimed for that bajillion dollar salary then who in bloody hell would sell you your items, fix your car, build your house, fix your drain, and the various other tasks that do not require a 4 year degree.

I have a friend that has a degree in organic chemistry and chemical engineering.. you know what he does for a living? He works in retail he found that he likes it better.

My response to those that tell me I should go back to school is simply, "If everyone went to college who would be here to sell you your items?"

[DesignFox]

I went to college. I still work in retail. I kinda like it. My Ex told me it made me a loser.

I sympathize. I don't think I'm a loser... I'm not millionaire. I don't have ALL the things I want in life. But I pay my bills. I make enough to keep my hobby. So..... I guess I'm doing alright?

[BroomJockey]

You know what? To me, it's about one thing.

Are ya happy?

If you can at least tolerate your job, you're not stressed about money, and you can do enough of what you want in your spare time, you're doing well.

I took two years of University courses, ended up hating the atmosphere, and didn't think I'd enjoy the career track I'd been aiming for because of it.

So I took some time off, and worked customer service at a movie theatre, and I really loved it there. In fact, if it'd paid more, I'd probably still be there. Hell, I'd probably have made manager by now (or at least I hope I would have, considering how high up I was).

But, I needed more cash for bills sooner, so the happiness equation was thrown out of whack. Thus, I hit up college for a program, hit a path that would still have me doing stuff I liked, I get paid a little over twice what I was making, so now I have a job that I like, can pay for my bills, and still have enough to feed the DVD habit I've picked up. I'll never be rich, I'm sure, but I'm comfortable, and enjoying life. :) So no, a four-year university degree sure ain't the only way to be happy, which is a much better metric for success, imo.

[Teysa]

I'm a 35 year old college dropout. I may go back someday but at this rate I'll probably be 55. However, I work at a job I enjoy with decent benefits and good hours.

I guess in the eyes of the world, I am a failure. However, I have a roof over my head, I don't go to bed hungry, and all the bills get paid. I'm also in a better place mentally and emotionally then I have been in years.

[AdminAssistant]

This is why I love my parents. Where I'm from, being in school until you're almost thirty, not getting married and having gets right way - those are measures of failure. When I'm back home, the people there regard me with amusement and pity, "Oh, well, you'll figure it out one day, you poor dear. When are you moving back?" I even get this from some extended family. Luckily, I only have to deal with them during Christmas.

My parents long ago told me that as long as I am happy and comfortable, with a roof over my head and food on the table, they'll support me wherever I go and whatever I do. They know I'm not meant to live in that particular corner of the world, and they know that what I'm doing takes a long time and a lot of commitment. Without them backing me up...I don't know if I could do it.

Success is what you make of it. The way I figure it, every morning that I wake up on this side of the grass is a success.

[jackfaire]

My thing is I have always been about studying humans. I love exploring humanity through our art, through traveling, through talking to people from all over.

My whole life I was told I talk to much now I get paid to talk to people all day. That is my job to talk how awesome is that?

Later today I have a visit with my daughter I am going to hug her tell her I love her and wonder how anyone could think my having her makes me a failure.

[Flyndaran]

As a rationalist atheist, I believe that ultimately nothing we do matters. It will all end up as dust in the wind.
Because of that, the only thing that matters is getting as much happiness in our short lives as possible. All the rest is unnecessary crap.

[kiwi]

I am a 29 year old college dropout father of a beautiful 8 year old girl, who writes in his spare time and works a job he loves. The world would call me a failure because of this.

The world? Who is speaking for the entire world? They sure as hell aren't speaking for me!

Do what you want to do, do what makes you happy. There will always be people who judge you, look down on you, try to treat you like scum on their boots, who disapprove of what you think/believe/love/do. I limit my contact with those people as much as possible.

[Talon]

"Great men do not conquer others. Great men conquer themselves." - unknown

"Happiness is the exercise of vital powers along lines of excellence in a life affording you scope." - ancient Greek proverb

Flyndaran: I disagree. Our actions, our words can affect others for good or ill. Our influence can outlast our flesh.

[Flyndaran]

...
Flyndaran: I disagree. Our actions, our words can affect others for good or ill. Our influence can outlast our flesh.

For years, maybe even millenia if famous. But on geological scale all we do will come to naught. On the scale of eternity, it will all end in the heat death of the universe. There is an end to everything.

[BroomJockey]

But on geological scale all we do will come to naught. On the scale of eternity, it will all end in the heat death of the universe. There is an end to everything.

Yes, but considering that it will come many, many, many generations into the future, our words and actions have impact and points on what I like to call a "relevant" measure of time. As in "not talking about the entire span of the space-time continuum." So though everything eventually ends, it'd be nice to not increase the relative amount of misery in the world by being a dick, and maybe even be remembered (or at least have done actions that would be viewed) in a positive light.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Why is it that only money and a big name job is the only thing considered success.



Don't worry about that. It's only considered success by people who don't matter.

And if that is the only thing that means success to them....well....they aren't very successful, are they. ;)

I went to college. I still work in retail. I kinda like it. My Ex told me it made me a loser.

I dropped out of college and eventually got a very nice professional career. And then got laid off. And it rocks. College, no college, job, no job. Life is what you make of it. And that fact that your ex is now your ex kind of makes you a winner. He sounds like a wad.

[DesignFox]

<snip> And that fact that your ex is now your ex kind of makes you a winner. He sounds like a wad.
Thanks for the LOL.

Yea, he started out as a nice guy... certain life situations change people and I'll leave it at that.

I have a nice boyfriend now who doesn't judge me by my paycheck. ;)

[Boozy]

I work in retail by choice, too.

I have a bachelor's degree, but I don't want to do anything with it. I don't like the career options it provides me. When I started university, I was 18 years old and I thought I knew what I wanted to do with my life. By the time I graduated, I realized I had chosen the wrong discipline.

I don't regret going to school, by any means. But it is a bit harder to justify to others why I'm still working a "crappy" job when I have the option to do something else.

Hell, I don't even want to be a manager. I've turned down management jobs in the past. You should see people's surprise when they hear that. Society demands that you take any job with the power and the big paycheque if one is offered to you. Telling someone that you're not interested in that kind of thing gets you a look like you've just punched their kitten or something.

[jackfaire]

Wow thanks guys I really appreciate the responses. I love what I do for a living and I love the freedom to leave my work at the office and not have to bring it home.

It's hard sometimes though because money can be tight and I hear people my age buying houses and people who realize I am intelligent telling me I am wasting my potential.

A couple of months ago I read an article where someone who used to make a ton more money than me now works a job similar to mine making more money than I make, what I make is enough to thrive on, calling my job a survival job.

I guess that would probably be a whole other thread

[Arcade Man D]

When I started university, I was 18 years old and I thought I knew what I wanted to do with my life. By the time I graduated, I realized I had chosen the wrong discipline.

I can relate to that. I went straight out of High School into college for an IT degree with Network Administration specialization.

After a few semesters, I realized that computers were something fun for me, but of that weird sort of fun that's not fun if you have to do it.

On the other hand, what I enjoyed was helping people. I ended up taking time off due to financial issues and academic issues, and working in CS. Unlike some people here, I did not enjoy CS in general, but again, I enjoyed when I got a chance to teach a customer something new....

So that brings me back to where I am now, doing what I had originally planned to do when I was in 9th grade, and working toward a Master's Degree that will have me earning slightly less than my father makes after 20 years in a factory, because it's what I'll enjoy.