Bailing Out Adult Kids and Parents: Good Idea Or Bad Idea

[tropicsgoddess]

I am okay with bailing out an adult child or parent if it's an absolute emergency or if it's a one time deal, but when it's a constant thing, no way.


Parents Bailing Out Adult Children (http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com/CollegeAndFamily/RaiseKids/ShouldParentsBailOutTheirKids.aspx?page=2)


Adult Children Bailing Out Spendthrift Parents (http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com/CollegeAndFamily/CaringForParents/ShouldYouBailOutSpendthriftParents.aspx)


To me, parents who constantly bail their adult children out financially are making things worse for both themselves and their children by not helping them to be self-sufficient and reliant with their money. As for the parents, it can be tough to live on fixed income and the like, but constantly giving them money to spend on things beyond their means is not okay.

[rahmota]

Well as I've said before family must take care of family. It is a debt of blood and honor. This means that a child owes a parent and a parent owes a child help in meeting their basic needs. This does not mean that if the child wants a 7000" tv or a fancy new car that the parent should help them get it or get it for them. Or if they are living beyond their means that a constant bail out shoudl be done.

However if either one is in danger of loosing their home or their food or whatever then the debt comes into play and help must be given.

[AFPheonix]

It really depends on the circumstance, and frankly those articles pretty much outlined my opinion. I'm fortunate that I came from a pretty financially conservative home so that really rubbed off on me. At this point the only debt I carry is student loans, and those are at a third of what they were when I graduated in '02. I paid my car off last year.

If I was in a position where I had a kid who needed money, the first thing I'd do is decide how much money I could frankly give that I could live without. I wouldn't give to the point where it would put my own finances in jepoardy. The second, provided the debt accrued was due to bad money handling, would be to insist that before my kid got my money that they take some finance classes. I'd also write up a payment schedule that both of us would sign.
But I hope to avoid that by making sure that in the event I ever have a kid, that they learn how to properly handle their money well before they leave my nest. Maybe they'll get "The Millionaire Next Door" for their 12th birthday or something like that :p