Game: Take offense to what the person above you says

[Lace Neil Singer]

This is quite a fun game; I saw it originally on Metal Sludge, and seeing as the trend now is to be offended by everything and anything... :p Basically, the first person posts a statement, and the next person posts how they are offended, then posts another and so on. I'll start.


Sneezing is disgusting.

[Flyndaran]

A natrual bodily function disgusting!? That's awful.

But Coke sucks, only Pepsi products deserve to be sold.

[Amethyst Hunter]

I am offended by your Pepsi bias. I believe that NEITHER should be sold, since they both taste disgusting to me. :p

(Now Mountain Dew, baby, THAT'S where it's at!)

My offensive statement: Those who do not drown their food in gravy are heathen fools. :D

[powerboy]

Gravy only belongs on mashed potatoes. That is the only thing that Gravy tastes great on.


Football and Boxing is fake

[Giggle Goose]

Ahh, but the sheer joy of drinking mad amounts of beer and yelling at men in tight pants/shirtless sweaty dudes is completely and entirely REAL. If loving something fake is wrong, then I don't want to be right!

Anyone who takes part in Black Friday consumerism is a toolbag.

[vanima]

!!! I LIKE SALES!!! who doesn't like to get things for cheap?!


anyone who watches porn is a pervert!

[DrT]

anyone who watches porn is a pervert!

Excuse me but I'm offended by that: tis not because I watch porn that my mind is twisted in such a way that I will undress any female person coming my way and imagine her bent over something, wet with desire. Or imagine what use could be done of bungee rope and a few well placed vibrating implements. Neither may I be interested in exploring part of my wife's body that represent unacceptable venues for a gentleman. And I won't forever fantasize on intercourse with multiple women for long drawn winter days with no interruptions save for necessary resupply of lube and condom or the possible change of batteries.











Then again, maybe I do..... ;)


my statement: Mayonnaise on pasta is just wrong.

[DesignFox]

And I won't forever fantasize on intercourse with SO for long drawn winter days with no interruptions save for necessary resupply of lube and condoms....


edited for my personal preference/amusement.

Did it just get hot in here??? :p


my statement: Mayonnaise on pasta is just wrong.

I am offended by this statement! How dare you insinuate that Mayonnaise on pasta is anything less than the best combination ever invented!


NT:

Merry Christmas!

[anriana]

Merry Christmas!

I cannot believe that you would dare to profane Precious Baby Jesus by celebrating such a pagan-influenced holiday or wishing that your fellow blasphemers actually enjoy their heathen ritual.

NT: Puppies are cute.

[BlaqueKatt]

Puppies are cute.

something that demands you be a total slave to it's whims, destruction of property is not cute no matter if it be by chewing or piddling(or worse) on the rug-at least cats come litter trained by their mothers.


Mice and rats are the best pets one can own!

[Lace Neil Singer]

How dare you champion the keeping of disgusting, disease ridden vermin as pets! Shame on you!

Children are our future.

[Amethyst Hunter]

Children are our future.

And that future is Fucked with a capital F.

Pizza is the world's - no, the universe's - greatest food EVAR. And anybody who disagrees with me is a big old meanie poopie-head! :p

[DesignFox]

And that future is Fucked with a capital F.

I LOL'd!!! Can I borrow that exchange????


Pizza is the world's - no, the universe's - greatest food EVAR. And anybody who disagrees with me is a big old meanie poopie-head! :p

NO way! Pizza is horrendous. I'm disgusted by your taste in food. We all know sushi trumps pizza anyday. ;)

NT:

Only you can prevent forest fires!

[Amethyst Hunter]

I LOL'd!!! Can I borrow that exchange????

Sure can. :D

Only you can prevent forest fires!

*sets down gas can and flicks lighter* Whaddya mean, "prevent" them?! >:-)

[Lace Neil Singer]

(yes, you can just take offence at the statement someone makes as a reply to another statement)

You evil arsonist! Enjoy the firesetting now, but how will you cope with the eternal fires of hell?!

XD

[BlaqueKatt]

You evil arsonist! Enjoy the firesetting now, but how will you cope with the eternal fires of hell?!


how dare you exclude all other religions other than Christianity-you just assume we all believe in hell.....


NT:
Frogs are the most adorable amphibians ever-well next to newts/Salamanders anyway

[Lace Neil Singer]

You're insulting the French! They can eat frogs if they so wish, whether they're cute or not!

[Amethyst Hunter]

You evil arsonist! Enjoy the firesetting now, but how will you cope with the eternal fires of hell?! XD

Heaven doesn't want me and Hell's afraid I'll take over. >:-D

You're insulting the French! They can eat frogs if they so wish, whether they're cute or not!

People who eat meatloaf are DEEESSS-GUSTING!

[IDrinkaRum]

I'm offended by that! Meatloaf is the only thing I can get both my daughter AND my husband to eat on any given night! :p

The only sauce on spaghetti should be Alfredo!

[BlaqueKatt]

The only sauce on spaghetti should be Alfredo!


Alfredo is for fettuccine only! how dare you taint it with your round noodles that don't allow the full richness of the cream and Parmesan to blossom.

Doc Martins are the best footwear ever invented!!!!

[Lace Neil Singer]

You disgust me with your insane prejudice against high heels! You heelist! XD

The best race is the human race.

[IDrinkaRum]

Nonono! The best race is the rat race as rats are much more cuter and nicer than humans. :p

Coffee drinkers are too overly strung and need to be shot if they become too caffeinated.

[Sylvia727]

How dare try to deny me my right to the pursuit of happiness! Filthy hippie, with your "living clean" nonsense. Go eat some tofu! And then get a job!

The shirt you're wearing right now is absolutely hideous.

[IDrinkaRum]

Hey! I'm not wearing a shirt so how can it ... OoO! That's mean! :p

Sharon Osborne is epitomizes womanhood.

[Lace Neil Singer]

That foul mouthed slut in no way is the ideal woman! You must be insane!

Rap is good for black culture.

[Rapscallion]

No I 'm not! I'm not very cultured at all!

Ninjas should marry pirates.

Rapscallion

[Boozy]

That's the most disgusting thing I've ever heard. I can hardly imagine the monstrous offspring of such an unholy union.

Chocolate is delicious.

[vanima]

DELICIOUS?! are you insane! chocolate is not just delicious! saying it is only delicious is offensive! CHOCOLATE IS THE FOOD OF THE GODS! *random rant for 20 minutes about how chocolate is more than delicious* And THATS THAT! *stomps foot and storms off*




quiet toys are the best to give children for christmas

[IDrinkaRum]

Of course they aren't! The louder the toy the better baby! That way you can drown out your in-laws criticizing how you're raising your kids.

Chuck is the best show on Monday nights.

[ArenaBoy]

Chuck? A pathetic spoof of what would be commonplace in the 80s is considered decent? Give me a break.

Anime is overrated.

[smileyeagle1021]

ArenaBoy, I'd tend to agree with you, but how dare you belittle an art form that brings happiness to so many people, next you'll be saying porn is distasteful :p

day shift employees have to be the dumbest people ever, seriously with all the mistakes they make I'm surprised they can wipe themselves after using the toilet.

[IDrinkaRum]

Hey! I'm offended by that! I'm a day person at my job and the reason I make so many mistakes is because I have too much blood in my caffeine stream! Give them a break ... and lots of coffee! ;)

Roast beef is the only luncheon meat to be used on a sandwich.

[smileyeagle1021]

IDR, you must be kidding, everyone knows that the best sandwhich will have ham and pepperoni (shut up, I know, I'm weird)

My controversal statement is that Astro Burger has the best burgers on the planet and there is no arguments allowed on that!

[wanderingjoe72]

My controversal statement is that Astro Burger has the best burgers on the planet and there is no arguments allowed on that!

Astro Burger? How can a place be unknown and have the best burgers on the planet? If they truly were, they would be world famous like McDonalds. (must keep straight face)


Marvel comics are really the only real comics.

[IDrinkaRum]

Hah! Marvel comics are going down hill and all the stories are being recycled. The only thing that is saving them are the movies Marvel Studios is making. If you want absolutely wonderful comics check out the Grimm Fairy Tales done by Zenescope. Now, those are comics!

The last decade with really great music was the 1960's.

[BlaqueKatt]

The last decade with really great music was the 1960's.

Wow that decade had such gems as incense and peppermint, I am the Walrus, and purple haze-wow can't really compare lyrically to the likes of nightwish, Disturbed, and AFI :rolleyes:, maybe living in the past is great, but my mom loves disturbed.(she's 63 by the way)


Raves are awesome!

[Cat]

we can all be united in out hatred of ravers :-)


My statement: Pluto is a planet!!!

[Slytovhand]

How dare you???? Pluto is a dog! How can anyone possibly mistake a dog for a planet??? sheeesh!

We need more Gar Pride marches... :D

[DesignFox]

We need more Gar Pride marches... :D

Except that Raps can't be everywhere at once, and I am appalled at the idea of any march without him leading it...

NT:

Chocolate is the best food ever created.

[smileyeagle1021]

Chocolate is the best food ever created.

oh I must beg to differ... chocolate may be good but it certainly isn't the best food ever created... and while I'm taking offense, I'm offended that you beat me to posting so I couldn't make a smart ass comment about Gar Pride Parades :p

NT

while chocolate may be a good food there is no denying that ice cream is better, specifically Aggie Blue Mint ice cream, available only at the Aggie Ice Cream store in Logan Ut... see it's so good it's even got an exclusive location :D

[rdp78]

I never had Aggie but I do think mint ice cream is the nastiest frozen desert I had ever tasted. I mean mint is fine for freshing my breath but not for a sweet treat.

NT

Christmas is the most wonderful time of the year.

[IDrinkaRum]

OMG!!! I can't believe you mentioned Christmas! And it's a season now? OMG! Help! :D Ahem ... well, I sorta like it .. as long as i don't have to go out and mingle with the unwashed masses as they, in their zombie-like state buy everything in sight.

Blowing bubbles is the best way to destress.

[smileyeagle1021]

WTF, Bubbles is such a nice girl, you shouldn't be blowing Bubbles for no other reason than stress release :p (well, one of us had to take this thread to the gutter, might as well be me ;) )

nt-
Softhotel is a joke, it must be the worst hotel software package ever to be inflicted upon hotel workers.

[powerboy]

You hate Softhotel:eek:. But it is the greatest thing, since sliced bread.

Winter is a great season.

[smileyeagle1021]

Winter is a great season :eek: are you fracking kidding me, it's cold, the roads are icy, it gets dark at like 5 in the afternoon, and it brings out all the crazed shoppers... no, I'll take summer anyday

which brings us to the next topic
Summer is infinitely better than winter.

[lordlundar]

HAH1 What a joke! Summer is a time of over exhaustion and overheating. Autumn and Spring are better than Summer and Winter ANY DAY!

[IDrinkaRum]

I take offense to that! I hate all the seasons! I don't like the cold, the wet, the extremely hot. I'm uncomfortable all year around.

Cinderella is the best fairy tale ever told.

[Amethyst Hunter]

Ahh, Cinderella, that classic brainwashing dreck aimed at impressing upon little girls how important it is to be pretty rather than smart and a Rich Man will magically come take away all your troubles!

Fake Christmas trees are better than real ones.

[Saydrah]

HEATHEN!!!!! Only real Christmas trees are representative of the fine Christmas tradition! Having a fake one would be like a fake Nativity scene. Everyone knows a real baby Jesus and real manger and donkeys is the only way to go.


You should start every morning with a cup of coffee!

[lordlundar]

GAG! *HACK* *COUGH!* What a nasty concept coffee is! Now tea! that's where it's at.

[Amethyst Hunter]

Tea is the vile piss of demonic butt gopher lawyers.

HEATHEN!!!!!

I failz to see ur problem. :D ;)

Thou shalt always put walnuts or pecans in thy chocolate chip cookies.

[IDrinkaRum]

OMG!!! Chocolate Chip Cookies are what makes the world go round in peace and harmony and if you start messing up the peaceful co-existence of cookie dough & chocolate chips by adding other ingredients, the world will stop spinning and we'd all be thrown off into outer space. I mean really ... do you want that on your head? :D

We should have a television station dedicated to just commercials so they don't interrupt our television programs.

[smileyeagle1021]

IDAR, are you on crack... they already have such a station, it's called HSN, and we still have more commercials interrupting our shows... all your proposal will do is increase the number of channels we don't watch but have to pay for anyway.

Black cats are the BEST cats (I loves my fat black cat :D )

[IDrinkaRum]

Nuhuh! Orange/white tabbies and brown/white tabbies are the bestest because they make the bestest nap warmers! Ayup! My brown/white tabby lays between my knees and keeps them warm & my white/orange tabby keeps my left side warm. So there! :p

Chicken soup is the only thing your soul needs to make it feel better. :p

[Boozy]

Chicken soup is the only thing your soul needs to make it feel better.

Slaughtering helpless chickens, cutting up their corpses, stewing their amputated body parts, and then shoving the pieces down your gullet makes your soul feel better?! You psychopath!

Children's choirs are wonderful, and in no way nails-on-chalkboard annoying.

[DesignFox]

Slaughtering helpless chickens, cutting up their corpses, stewing their amputated body parts, and then shoving the pieces down your gullet makes your soul feel better?! You psychopath!


That's hilarious. :)


Children's choirs are wonderful, and in no way nails-on-chalkboard annoying.

Maybe if you are tone deaf.... gah! How could you enjoy that crap?

NT:
Children should be seen and not heard! :p

[IDrinkaRum]

Oh God no! Children should be heard and not seen. That way if they've hurt themselves you'll know. And besides, I don't want to see another completely child naked covered in their own & the family's pet's poo. Ewwwww .... !!!!!

Only the animals in the wild have the best life.

[Slytovhand]

Bah humbug! No lounging around on the lounge for them! No kitty-kat, having to go hunt for all that food stuffs and water everyday, having to travel hundreds of miles every year. No playing catch the stick, catch the frisbee, catch the car. No pampering, no TV, no popularity (think of all the photos), no dedicated websites with silly mispellings with silly photos. No silly names. No chance of becoming a film star


Now, "Girls gone wild" have the best life..:D

[McDreidel09]

Now, "Girls gone wild" have the best life..:D

That is the most boring crap ever!! All they do is take off their shirt and bounce their breasts around!!! Only once in a while do they make out!! If I'm going to be watching naked people, they should be having hot,hot sex!!! :p



I love jalapeno and cheese bread!

[Amethyst Hunter]

Cheese bread is all right, but jalapenos are Satan's dingleberries!

Plain (red and white) candy canes are better than red, green and white candy canes.

[IDrinkaRum]

Hah! Candy canes, no matter the color, are delicious and need to be worshiped at the altar of the Christmas Tree or whatever holiday decoration that's large and in your house at this time of year. :D

Pickles are an abomination to cucumbers and should be outlawed.

[McDreidel09]

Pickles are an abomination to cucumbers and should be outlawed.


Pickles are the thing that gives all food it touches flavor!

Dried fruit is AMAZING!!

[Lace Neil Singer]

Drying fruit is actually fruit abuse and should not be encouraged! Fruit abuser!

X-Factor rules.

[smileyeagle1021]

X-Factor rules.

obviously not sense I haven't even heard of it... how can it rule if there are people who haven't heard of it?

Roger Moore was a terrible James Bond.

[McDreidel09]

Roger Moore was a terrible James Bond.


How dare you!!! He was the best one EVAR!!!omg eleventy!!1111


It's better to go to a community college the first two years of college and get Gen Ed out of the way for a cheaper price.

[Evandril]

How dare you!!! He was the best one EVAR!!!omg eleventy!!1111


It's better to go to a community college the first two years of college and get Gen Ed out of the way for a cheaper price.

You'd sacrifice the very foundation of your education to save a few dollars? How dare you!

Dolphins are smarter than humans ;)

[Amethyst Hunter]

You FAIL! CATS are smarter than both dolphins and humans combined!

Adam Sandler movies are the 11th plague.

[Lace Neil Singer]

You only think that cuz you're too STOOPID to fully understand them!

Cow/Human hybrids are wrong.

[Slytovhand]

You insulting, discriminating heathen!!! Just cos you choose not to believe in Krshna and Aditi is not reason to say they're 'wrong'!

Besides - can you imagine the milk they'd produce?? :p



Telling bad jokes is a waste of time.

[Lace Neil Singer]

You abnormal freak! Laughter is the best medicine, so bad jokes are a form of letting out. Why would anyone want to ban them, save people with no sense of humour?

Happy Winterval!

[smileyeagle1021]

Happy Winterval!

*coughcough* don't you mean Merry Christmas :p

though on a completely unrelated topic, there is almost nothing that can't be wrapped up in a tortilla and be made better.

[Lace Neil Singer]

Gasp! You would put puppies in tortillas? You monster! o_O

Makeup should be exclusively for women only.

[AFPheonix]

What? Where would Alice and Chains and Twisted Sister be without their made-up stars?

[smileyeagle1021]

I'm offended that AFPheonix forgot to make a new topic to be offended at :p

Merry Christmas

[Slytovhand]

Christmas??? You christian elitist misguided fool....

Have a Happy New Year :D

[smileyeagle1021]

humbug, the new year will probably be as shitty as the last

and yes, I know I am a very negative person right now.

[DesignFox]

and yes, I know I am a very negative person right now.

Well, you should cheer up, goddammit! :p Your negative vibes offend my delicate sensibilities.

*snicker*

There's no place like home...

[IDrinkaRum]

OMG! You have obviously never been to my home! I have a Dad who agrees with everything my Mother says & my Mom has the martyr thing down pat. Trust me, I'd rather be anywhere but there.

Adult Footie Pajamas are the only pj's to wear.

[AFPheonix]

Ha! How am I ever to get any action in footie pajamas? That, and they're too stinkin' hot. Tank top and saucy undies for me, please.

Rain storms following weeks-long snow storms suck balls.

[Amethyst Hunter]

FOOL! Rain storms following weeks-long snow storms do not suck balls. They suck FLAMING BURRITO ASS!

Barq's root beer is the God of all root beers.

[McDreidel09]

I'm sorry. You are very wrong. A&W whoops Barq hiney. (OT, but my nickname in Track was Rootbeer because my initials are AW :p )

One should not get drunk in front of children.

[blas87]

OMG like how dare you! There is nothing wrong with drinking in front of children! You have no idea what it's like to get knocked up at 15 and lose your right to party and have fun! I do whatever I want, and you WILL cater to me and my children because I am a PARENT!!!!111!!!! ELEVENTY!!

Dramatic enough for you?

Anyone who still wears a fanny pack should be pelted with snowballs.

[DesignFox]

Anyone who still wears a fanny pack should be pelted with snowballs.

Are you crazy? Fanny packs are the height of fashion! In fact, I wear mine everywhere. How dare you dis me! :p

Child-Free is the way to be.

[AFPheonix]

Well, kiss the human race goodbye there, you anti-breeder, you. Grats.

Double shots of tequila are of the devil.

[IDrinkaRum]

Only if the Devil is really God in disguise. Sometimes, you just need something strong to get through the day ... hour ... minute ... second. *hic* :p

Board games are just boring.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

You're clearly drunk. On rum.

And you didn't share.

Okay. I see how it is. I'll remember this.

[IDrinkaRum]

You'll remember what? That board games are boring? :p Yeah, yeah, I've heard it before. :D

Childrens television shows are designed to expand the minds of children but when an adult watches them, they are reduced to a vegetable mentality.

[McDreidel09]

The adult is just being sentimental and trying to relive the good ol' days! (Ok. I admit to doing this...)

I should be able to buy cigarettes if I can be tried as an adult and sent to an adult prison. (I'm 17 btw)

[smileyeagle1021]

What, you want the ability to kill yourself a year earlier... geez, at least wait until 18 before starting that slow suicide.

Oh, and I'm not that old damnit! (FTR, 22, though the way my roommates talk it might as well be 220)

[Slytovhand]

You?? Not old?? hahahaha :p

yeah - right.

You're ancient!

Or...

22 is old? You're kidding, right??

22 is still a child! Your roommate needs a right smack around the head!


Full moons are great!

[AFPheonix]

Some people's full moons are downright hairy and cheesy. Get that thing out of my face!

Interns are drooling idiots.