Sending kids to bed without dinner

[AFPheonix]

No, but can you guarantee it won't promote bad eating habits in those kids later on in life? I just think there should be other ways to punish even the most stubborn kid.

Like what? Not eating late at night? Eating a large meal at breakfast?

I'm saying this is a tool in a large toolbox with many more tools in it. Obviously this is a pretty large hammer, and if you're having to pull it out often to get your point across, then you as a parent need to figure out a better method of positive/negative reinforcement. It should really only be used for pretty egregious errors on the kid's part.

[guywithashovel]

I like to eat veggies and fruits when I was a kid.

So did I. In fact, once I got past my short-lived picky stage, I ended up liking a lot of foods that kids are often stereotyped as not liking. I liked broccoli, and still do. I liked spinach, and still do. I liked lima beans, and still do.

[powerboy]

(but what kid wasn't?)

I like to eat veggies and fruits when I was a kid. Sending kids to bed without dinner is not cruel. It is like spanking. If that is an option they have, then by all means.

[DesignFox]

My parents never used it is a form of punishment.

The only time I got denied dinner was when they would make something and I would refuse to eat it. If I didn't eat what was made, then I didn't eat at all.

That happened once that I can remember. Never did complain at dinner again...

And the rule about veggies was that I had to try them. If I tried them and still didn't like them, then we would move on to a different veggie. (but I had to eat them all the very first time- none of this "take one tiny bite and throw a hissy fit" stuff.

For instance, my parents never forced me to eat green beans again...I did what I was told and ate them, even though the first bite was horrible... then immediately puked them up all over the table...

[katie kaboom]

Not having food for 12 hours is hardly the epitome of cruelty.

No, but can you guarantee it won't promote bad eating habits in those kids later on in life? I just think there should be other ways to punish even the most stubborn kid.

[AFPheonix]

Like I said, it's one tool in the toolbox. If you have a kid that is food motivated and are having trouble getting him to alter his behavior any other way, this might be the answer. Not having food for 12 hours is hardly the epitome of cruelty.

[Boozy]

Punishment by hunger is like punishment by spanking. It's corporal. I don't see any qualitative differences. So I would imagine that people who support spanking as punishment would support this as well.

[guywithashovel]

It seems that most of the people who have responded have associated this with kids who don't want to eat what has been cooked for the meal. I was actually talking about using the missed dinner as a punishment. For example, it's dinnertime and the kid is acting up badly. Maybe he's running around, knocking chairs over, bothering the other kids, etc. The parent decides to send him straight to bed without his dinner.

My mom actually did have some battles with my sister and me over finicky attitudes towards food. I went through a faze where I was super picky about what I ate, and so did my sister. I can remember one time my mom made pasta for dinner, and she added some kind of herbs to the pasta. I'm not sure what it was, but there were tiny specs of green herbs on all of the strands of pasta. For that reason, I didn't want to eat it. My mom's spoken attitude was, "Eat what I cook, or don't eat at all." But I think that even on our really picky nights, we ended up eating at least something.

[katie kaboom]

Now that I think about it, with the way I eat while at school (2 meals is a good day, 1 meal is average), missing out on dinner every so often is not a big deal at all.

Yeah, but you're an adult. Making a deliberate choice to skip a meal as an adult is one thing, but to deny it to a kid as a punishment is cruel. Plus since kids don't really think of a meal as a reward, it may not even do much to deter them from misbehaving. Take away something that's fun to them. Taking away dinner is not a healthy way to teach your kids to behave.

[kiwi]

My Mum made one dinner for everyone and thats what I had to eat.
There were times we relied on the salvation army food donations to have anything to eat so my brother and I shut up and ate whatever it was.
It wasn't usually bad tasting, just very plain... spices were expensive and usually out of the question.

Any food is better than no food and mum didn't need the added stress of kids moaning about food she stuggled to get on the table. My brother and I were usually just happy that there was something to eat.

I now can no longer eat spagetti bol anymore because all anyone ever seems to give the sallies was spagetti pasta and canned pasta sauce. I remember having it for weeks on end.

Any future kids I have won't be in the same position thankfully but I won't be putting up with any moaning either. If I take the time to make dinner, they can bloody well eat it with no lip, or they can have no food. At least they will have a choice.

[katie kaboom]

How is hiding broccoli in a brownie really helping in the long term?

That reminds me of when I was little and the rule was I couldn't have dessert unless I ate all my dinner. I didn't like broccoli all that much when i was a kid (love it now though) and so I dipped my broccoli in my chocolate pudding and ate it. My mother thought it was gross, but she let me get away with it, beacuse it was getting me to actually eat the broccoli.

[Boozy]

One thing to consider, though: Kids have far more sensitive tastebuds than adults. Parents sometimes forget that. Cooked vegetables such as peas, carrots, and broccoli have very strong flavours. Kids aren't reacting to how they taste so much as how strongly they taste.

[AdminAssistant]

What I can't stand is the Jessica Seinfield idea of hiding veggies in chocolate. Um, shouldn't you be teaching your kids that veggies can be good and good for you? How is hiding broccoli in a brownie really helping in the long term?

We weren't a big veggie and fruit family - except in the spring and summer, when our neighbor's garden would start producing and the corn was ready. Then it was all veggies, all the time! Lucky me, with the littlest fingers, getting to silk the corn and shuck the peas. Lucky, lucky, lucky me.

[AFPheonix]

Most kids are picky about veggies. I myself hated (and still hate ) peas. I just figured out that if you pinched your nose shut, you couldn't taste them, especially with a milk chaser. Mom was happy, I was happy, and got my veggies.

[Greenday]

It was never cruel, however. He got breakfast the following morning, so it's not like he was truly starved or anything. Just a little wiser for the wear.

Now that I think about it, with the way I eat while at school (2 meals is a good day, 1 meal is average), missing out on dinner every so often is not a big deal at all.

I had to think back to what my parents would do to punish me, but now I remember. It was kinda mean too. If I refused to eat dinner, my parents told me they'd have to take me to the hospital and force feed me with tubes and needles. They'd try to scare me into eating. I'm going to have to have a "Remember when" chat with my mom now.