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This really pisses me off. My parents are always late for anything and everything they do when it involves other people. And I don't mean just a few minutes late -- if they're supposed to meet someone for lunch, they will be AT LEAST half an hour late. I remember quite vividly, when I was in elementary school, my mom would drop me off and pick me up from school. She would often drop me off late, late enough that the class had already started and if I had been in high school, it would be considered tardy. I got reprimanded several times by my teachers, despite the fact that I couldn't really do anything about it. When she was supposed to pick me up from school, she would be equally late -- actually, usually even more late. Late enough that all the buses were gone, all the other kids whose parents pick them up were gone, many of the teachers were gone, and I was stuck with the creepy janitor who I tried to hide from because he scared me. Which she knew. And didn't care about.
The latest incident is regarding my husband and I buying our house. They had told us, months and months and months ago, that they wanted to give us some money to put toward the downpayment of a house, when we finally settled on one. Okay, that's cool. We didn't ask for it and we didn't expect it, but if they want to help out, that's great. After we decided on which house we wanted, a few weeks ago, I brought the issue up to get some more details from them. And they had been talking about it the whole time we had been looking, "Oh, and don't forget, we're going to be giving you some money for this too!" so it's not like I was dragging up something that they had maybe said a while ago and then decided they didn't want to do it.
Anyway, so fast forward to this week. We're under contract, the house is in the "pending" status which means that we basically have it, we're just waiting to close on it. Except, we still don't have this money that my parents have promised us over and over again. My husband has been dealing with some issues with the bank. I imagine they said, "You said you were going to put 20% down but you only have 15% in your account -- where is the rest coming from?" So, we ask my parents if they're still planning on giving us any. Oh yes, absolutely. Well, when? Well, I guess this week would probably be good.
So on Wednesday, I talked to them and told them what they had to do to get the money to us. A wire transfer would be the fastest, easiest, and most secure way to transfer a large sum of money into our account. They would also have to write a letter to the bank basically stating that the money is a gift and they don't expect repayment on it, etc. etc. They start getting huffy and asking why they can't just put they money into our account and call it a day, and don't like it when I tell them that the bank needs proof of where the money came from, that it's not stolen, etc. I mean, it has to look a little suspicious if some people are buying a house and 3 weeks before closing, they get a large sum of money deposited into their account. My parents finally agree to and understand everything they have to do to get us the money.
We tell them, the sooner the better, because we are basically waiting on them right now, since the bank has to look over all their paperwork and everything once they receive it before we can move forward. And we're already a little crunched on time, because apparently the bank wants 30 days between when they're informed that the contract is signed and when closing is...which they never told us until it was too late, so we have a closing date set sooner than that. My parents say, no problem, we'll do it Friday morning. Wait, Friday morning? I'm giving you all of this information at 1:30 on Wednesday afternoon, and you're waiting until Friday morning?? Well, we don't want to go out today! It's too late to go out today! (what the hell?) and Thursday they have an appointment at noon, so that won't work either! Perish the thought that they might have to get up and do anything before 10am! Or run around after their appointment to do anything!
Okay, fine, whatever, Friday is fine, it's no big deal. They said they'd have it all done Friday morning and they would call me when it was done. I emphasized that it should really be done in the morning, mainly so that everything gets through the same day, and faxes can be resent in the afternoon if needed, in case they're not received.
So, it's 11:40 Friday morning and I haven't heard from them, despite the fact that they said they would call me when everything was done. Odd. Surely they're at least at the bank by now, in the middle of writing the paperwork (which the banker said would take all of 15 minutes)? My mom likes to sleep in till 10 or so in the morning, but even if she did that, they've still had plenty of time to get to the bank...
I'm so funny.
So I call them. "Hey, what's up?" "Not much, what's up with you?" "Not much...just checking to see how the wire transfer went." "Oh, we haven't done it yet. Your dad's going to go to the bank in an hour or two to get it done."
Blurgh!? It's 11:40, you were told (not only by me, mind you, but by the banker herself when they called her) to get this done before noon, and you're going to go "in an hour or two"!? They know that we are waiting for them to move forward, that our bank is already trying to rush the process since we have less than 30 days left till closing, and that the later they wait, the more chance there is that the wire transfer won't go through today, depending on how many other transfers their bank has to do before theirs. I asked her if she really wanted that money sitting in limbo all weekend and she said, "Oh, it's no big deal. You said it only takes a few minutes to do, right? So we can go whenever, and as long as it's before 5 they'll get it to you!"
This rant is not about the money. Really. We could make do without the money. We never asked for it and we never expected it. Part of me even wanted to not accept it because of all the strings that always come attached whenever they do anything for anyone. But I knew that declining it would be just as bad, if not worse, since it would insult them. But regardless, this rant is about the fact that they drag their feet and procrastinate about everything they do, especially when it comes to involving other people. Paying their own credit card bills? No problem, that's done the day they get them in the mail. Canceling a young adult card that was in my and my dad's name back when I was in high school? I told them multiple times I wasn't using the card and asked them to write a letter to close the account (since I couldn't, since I was considered the "young adult") and it took YEARS, until there was a fraudulent charge on the card (which, of course, was my fault) for my dad to write said letter.
It just pisses me off, because everything is hinging on THEM right now, the bank needs all their documentation before we can move forward, and they treat it like it's no big deal, ho hum, we'll get to it when we get to it and not anytime sooner and we don't care about the consequences of being late.
The latest incident is regarding my husband and I buying our house. They had told us, months and months and months ago, that they wanted to give us some money to put toward the downpayment of a house, when we finally settled on one. Okay, that's cool. We didn't ask for it and we didn't expect it, but if they want to help out, that's great. After we decided on which house we wanted, a few weeks ago, I brought the issue up to get some more details from them. And they had been talking about it the whole time we had been looking, "Oh, and don't forget, we're going to be giving you some money for this too!" so it's not like I was dragging up something that they had maybe said a while ago and then decided they didn't want to do it.
Anyway, so fast forward to this week. We're under contract, the house is in the "pending" status which means that we basically have it, we're just waiting to close on it. Except, we still don't have this money that my parents have promised us over and over again. My husband has been dealing with some issues with the bank. I imagine they said, "You said you were going to put 20% down but you only have 15% in your account -- where is the rest coming from?" So, we ask my parents if they're still planning on giving us any. Oh yes, absolutely. Well, when? Well, I guess this week would probably be good.
So on Wednesday, I talked to them and told them what they had to do to get the money to us. A wire transfer would be the fastest, easiest, and most secure way to transfer a large sum of money into our account. They would also have to write a letter to the bank basically stating that the money is a gift and they don't expect repayment on it, etc. etc. They start getting huffy and asking why they can't just put they money into our account and call it a day, and don't like it when I tell them that the bank needs proof of where the money came from, that it's not stolen, etc. I mean, it has to look a little suspicious if some people are buying a house and 3 weeks before closing, they get a large sum of money deposited into their account. My parents finally agree to and understand everything they have to do to get us the money.
We tell them, the sooner the better, because we are basically waiting on them right now, since the bank has to look over all their paperwork and everything once they receive it before we can move forward. And we're already a little crunched on time, because apparently the bank wants 30 days between when they're informed that the contract is signed and when closing is...which they never told us until it was too late, so we have a closing date set sooner than that. My parents say, no problem, we'll do it Friday morning. Wait, Friday morning? I'm giving you all of this information at 1:30 on Wednesday afternoon, and you're waiting until Friday morning?? Well, we don't want to go out today! It's too late to go out today! (what the hell?) and Thursday they have an appointment at noon, so that won't work either! Perish the thought that they might have to get up and do anything before 10am! Or run around after their appointment to do anything!
Okay, fine, whatever, Friday is fine, it's no big deal. They said they'd have it all done Friday morning and they would call me when it was done. I emphasized that it should really be done in the morning, mainly so that everything gets through the same day, and faxes can be resent in the afternoon if needed, in case they're not received.
So, it's 11:40 Friday morning and I haven't heard from them, despite the fact that they said they would call me when everything was done. Odd. Surely they're at least at the bank by now, in the middle of writing the paperwork (which the banker said would take all of 15 minutes)? My mom likes to sleep in till 10 or so in the morning, but even if she did that, they've still had plenty of time to get to the bank...
I'm so funny.
So I call them. "Hey, what's up?" "Not much, what's up with you?" "Not much...just checking to see how the wire transfer went." "Oh, we haven't done it yet. Your dad's going to go to the bank in an hour or two to get it done."
Blurgh!? It's 11:40, you were told (not only by me, mind you, but by the banker herself when they called her) to get this done before noon, and you're going to go "in an hour or two"!? They know that we are waiting for them to move forward, that our bank is already trying to rush the process since we have less than 30 days left till closing, and that the later they wait, the more chance there is that the wire transfer won't go through today, depending on how many other transfers their bank has to do before theirs. I asked her if she really wanted that money sitting in limbo all weekend and she said, "Oh, it's no big deal. You said it only takes a few minutes to do, right? So we can go whenever, and as long as it's before 5 they'll get it to you!"
This rant is not about the money. Really. We could make do without the money. We never asked for it and we never expected it. Part of me even wanted to not accept it because of all the strings that always come attached whenever they do anything for anyone. But I knew that declining it would be just as bad, if not worse, since it would insult them. But regardless, this rant is about the fact that they drag their feet and procrastinate about everything they do, especially when it comes to involving other people. Paying their own credit card bills? No problem, that's done the day they get them in the mail. Canceling a young adult card that was in my and my dad's name back when I was in high school? I told them multiple times I wasn't using the card and asked them to write a letter to close the account (since I couldn't, since I was considered the "young adult") and it took YEARS, until there was a fraudulent charge on the card (which, of course, was my fault) for my dad to write said letter.
It just pisses me off, because everything is hinging on THEM right now, the bank needs all their documentation before we can move forward, and they treat it like it's no big deal, ho hum, we'll get to it when we get to it and not anytime sooner and we don't care about the consequences of being late.
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