Starting rumors at work

[LadyBarbossa]

I'm so pissed off right now. I was in the store shopping today, talking to my friend/coworker Pippin*, and it turns out he showed up to work today and was informed by another coworker that there is a rumor he and yet another coworker are having an affair together. This is untrue. The person who told him this just thought he had a right to know, and to know who said it, as she is friends with the person he's having this imaginary 'affair' with.

He's had a rough year or so. His mother died, he was a passenger in an SUV that rolled, though miraculously no one was hurt, got himself arrested last winter, and had one of his kids get laid up with a really bad injury just after he started his job here at the store. He's been trying really hard lately to get his life straightened out and done an excellent job thus far at staying out of trouble. He's going through some emotional and spiritual confusion at the moment, trying to prune toxic people out of his life, and is generally kind of vulnerable and unhappy right now. Not that it makes him unlikeable, on the contrary, everyone seems to like and get along with him. He's really friendly and doesn't mess around at work and if he calls in, it's because he actually is sick or does have an emergency at home.

The two assholes responsible for going around snickering that "LOLZ, Pip and Ellie are screwing each other!" are constantly slacking off on the job and one of them has called in at least 8 times in the past six months, and that's not including when he leaves an hour or so into his shift because he 'doesn't feel good.' Pip usually ends up picking up the slack left behind by this guy, and even goes to the other asshole's department sometimes to help with inventory and downstacking because "Apparently Douche won't do it."

So these chuckleheads have nothing better to do, of course, than start rumors about the guy that management counts on to do their work for them when they slack off. He seemed really hurt by it, saying that he thought he got on alright with guy #1, since they work in the same department. Guy #1 is still worthless, but he thought things were OK between them nonetheless.

Good gawd. Welcome back to high school, I guess.

** Name not real for obvious reasons.

[IDrinkaRum]

It's nothing new, unfortunately. Bored people have to do things to entertain themselves.

When I worked at Roy Rogers (a fast food restaurant in the States), I was having affairs with no less than 2 assistant managers, another front line co-worker and at least 2 customers! Yeah. Right.

I just shrugged it off, and if anyone asked, I'd set them straight. But they still talked about it. 'cos you know ... no male & female can be friends without them boinking each other.

[LadyBarbossa]

Yeah, it happens, but I'm still pissed off. The guy is friendly with everyone, and he joked that the two of us should be careful or it'll be me having the affair with him next. I said if we are, I'd like to know, and he goes "Yeah me too! I don't remember having the first one, I don't wanna miss out on a second!"

'cos you know ... no male & female can be friends without them boinking each other.

Oh dear, this means he's probably banging half the store, no wonder he's always so tired and has that cheeky look on his face. For that matter, I guess it's just all one big store orgy. Our lounge has red lights, bwahaha.

I'm sure he'll shrug it off, but for the time being, he kept going on about it and seemed genuinely upset, which is unusual for him.

He did promise me he'd let me know if he finds out the two of us are having an affair though, LOL.

[BlaqueKatt]

When I worked at Roy Rogers (a fast food restaurant in the States), I was having affairs with no less than 2 assistant managers, another front line co-worker and at least 2 customers! Yeah. Right.

Yup I had that at the call center-one of my co-workers looked almost exactly like my husband(who worked a different shift in a different department, very few of my co-workers had ever seen him, and when they did always mistook him for CW)-only difference was hair color and height(hubs 6'2" dark brown hair, CW 6'4" light brown hair)*-I had pics of hubs and me at my desk and was constantly being asked when CW and I dated...um never that's my work wedding party pictures read the damn cake...so the rumor started due to a case of mistaken identity.....the running joke was we "did it" in between calls-as in we'd stand up at our cubes(opposite sides of the rows) and say (loudly) " hey just got off a call, now's our chance...aw dammit-thank you for calling cell phone carrier"

The best part was when my husband was "rumored" to be having an "affair" with the red-haired girl on the cell phone contract.....um that would be me guys...you know...his wife.....


Currently at my laboratory job I'm "involved with" one of the techs...we find it amusing as I may be masculine for a female...but not masculine enough for him if you get my drift.....yes we hang out outside of work....yes we're chatty at work...yes we call each other a lot....that means we're good friends.....sheesh....



*they even had the same haircut, glasses, and wore the same style of clothing...it was spooky as hell...I did at one point have a pic of the two of them together on either side of me to prove that yes there are two guys that work here that look almost identical......

[LadyBarbossa]

Fucking A. He said he showed up today and now the entire department is treating him like shit. Someone told the manager what was going on, and she pulls HIM aside and tells him 'we can't have all this drama and nonsense' and that he needs to stop it right now. He still doesn't know what he did. One girl said "Don't even talk to me" while the one he was rumored to be banging refuses to speak to him at all. Last week all of these people got on just fine with him and they were always laughing and carrying on together. I saw him an hour or so into his shift today and he was telling me all this; he looked like he wanted to cry.

He seemed better a while later; the manager had pulled him from his department and sent him to go zone grocery aisles. He seemed more himself as the day wore on, but he said he's still going to talk to the dept manager in another area and ask if there's still a position over there. That dept lead worked with him on remodel and likes him, so hopefully he can just get moved and leave all the drama behind.

People really suck sometimes.

[RavenStarr]

Can he go to HR and get these people for creating a hostile work environment? I know you said that he was looking to be moved to another dept. However I don't think the ones causing trouble should get away with it.

I also think the so called manager who pulled him aside should be fired. If she is that stupid to just believe a rumour instead of finding out if it is true or not. Or hell, I'll just throw this in and say it's possible that she herself could be involved in this rumour thing, because she dislikes him.

[blas87]

Unfortunately, most of the time, the victim is the one who gets moved, sometimes even let go. Sometimes they want to and graciously accept, other times they are forced to move and those responsible for creating the mess get to stay and find a new victim.

[LadyBarbossa]

Well, fortunately I have good news. After Saturday's disaster, he was off for two days and able to spend some time with friends/family and generally forget about all the drama for a while. When I saw him today, he said that it seems to have been straightened out in his absence and everyone is being really, really nice to him now. The guy who started the rumor apologized to him and said he didn't mean to cause all this trouble, he was only joking around. Pip told him geez, next time just joke around with him in person and not with the girl he told the rumor to. Apparently she didn't see the humor in it and she's the one who went to the manager with this mess. She's only a friend to the person Pip was supposedly screwing around with. She told a manager, she told Pip, she told pretty much everyone in the department. What should have been shrugged/laughed off got blown so far out of proportion that people were getting verbal warnings and we had a nice guy thinking about quitting his job because of it.

Not that I'm excusing the guy who started the rumor in the first place, he may be young but he should have known better than to walk up to some girl in his department and tell her that he thinks their coworkers are having an affair together.

Still, I see no reason why she felt the need to get her tampon on fire and go running to anyone who would listen about this guy's stupid joke rumor. Am I missing something here? If he'd told me, I probably would have known it wasn't true, and even if it was, it wasn't my business. Or even if the rumor had involved me, I would have laughed it off. Would anyone here have thought this worthy of a visit to management?

[Bronzebow]

Still, I see no reason why she felt the need to get her tampon on fire and go running to anyone who would listen about this guy's stupid joke rumor. Am I missing something here? If he'd told me, I probably would have known it wasn't true, and even if it was, it wasn't my business. Or even if the rumor had involved me, I would have laughed it off. Would anyone here have thought this worthy of a visit to management?

From the manager perspective, I can see handling rumors and office politics for the sake of CYA. They may want to stop the potential lawsuits and hostile work environment HR claims before they get that far.

Not that I'm excusing this one, mind you. I think it's pretty wrong to discipline the guy that rumors are being spread about. Taking a shotgun approach to social situations isn't usually a good idea, especially if everyone's taking it as a joke.

[RavenStarr]

Color me cynical but in IMHO I think there's more than one person that owes him an apology.

[blas87]

That's not cynical at all, that's being reasonable.

[LadyBarbossa]

From the manager perspective, I can see handling rumors and office politics for the sake of CYA. They may want to stop the potential lawsuits and hostile work environment HR claims before they get that far.

Not that I'm excusing this one, mind you. I think it's pretty wrong to discipline the guy that rumors are being spread about. Taking a shotgun approach to social situations isn't usually a good idea, especially if everyone's taking it as a joke.

Oh no, well I'm not talking about the manager. I'm talking about the girl who took this statement to the manager. We'll call her Tonya. Rumor Boy tells Tonya that Pippin and Elsie must be sleeping together because they get along so well. Tonya runs to Asst Manager Nancy before even consulting Elsie or Pip about this. Shit, meet fan. If Tonya hadn't said anything, I think nothing would have been made Rumor Boy's statement and life would have gone on as normal. Instead, Pip got ostracized for a day or two, verbally warned, and he says he got a few fugly looks from Elsie's husband last time he was in the store as well. I asked him today if Tonya was still mad at him (he walked in Saturday and said hi, she said "DON'T even talk to me!" WTF?), and he said she's started talking to him again, although she did look really embarrassed when he waved goodbye at her tonight. He also said that when Rumor Boy apologized, he hugged him really tight and wouldn't let go, pretty sure he was stoned out of his mind. The boy has issues, I swear. If he wasn't high out of his mind, he at least did feel really bad about what happened.

[Hobbs]

The guy's a jerk and you know he's a substance abuser? Why not just get him drug-tested and on his way out?


This kinda reminds me of a running joke with a fellow cadet. We get along really well and hang out a lot. To the point where we call each other "My Air Force ___friend." We've entertained the idea of starting the rumor ourselves and see how many people believe it.

[LadyBarbossa]

The guy's a jerk and you know he's a substance abuser? Why not just get him drug-tested and on his way out?

The only thing they'd have to go on is the fact that Pip observes the guy leaving for lunch, and when he comes back, he's all smiles and giggles and won't stop complaining about how hungry he is. So Pip's not gonna go running to management because he pretty much just likes to keep his head down and do his own job without getting caught up in drama. It's easier just to get along with everyone, see? Maybe Rumor Boy is just weird, and it's a perfectly normal reaction for him to run up and maul a coworker with hugs if he feels bad about what he did.

[Bronzebow]

Oh no, well I'm not talking about the manager. I'm talking about the girl who took this statement to the manager. We'll call her Tonya. Rumor Boy tells Tonya that Pippin and Elsie must be sleeping together because they get along so well. Tonya runs to Asst Manager Nancy before even consulting Elsie or Pip about this. Shit, meet fan. If Tonya hadn't said anything, I think nothing would have been made Rumor Boy's statement and life would have gone on as normal. Instead, Pip got ostracized for a day or two, verbally warned, and he says he got a few fugly looks from Elsie's husband last time he was in the store as well. I asked him today if Tonya was still mad at him (he walked in Saturday and said hi, she said "DON'T even talk to me!" WTF?), and he said she's started talking to him again, although she did look really embarrassed when he waved goodbye at her tonight. He also said that when Rumor Boy apologized, he hugged him really tight and wouldn't let go, pretty sure he was stoned out of his mind. The boy has issues, I swear. If he wasn't high out of his mind, he at least did feel really bad about what happened.

First: Oh, I see, I confused one male with another in the story. My bad!

Second: .... What the flying pancakes is up with Rumor Boy? Something tells me there are a couple other work stories revolving around him.