Fake Facebook Engagements

[hinakiba777]

I really thought people had gotten over this a few years ago, but every so often it will show up in my newsfeed. One of my facebook friends is engaged to someone else. However there is always something off about it. Like no indication of a boyfriend or girlfriend, but suddenly the person is engaged. OR they are supposedly of one sexual preference but their choice in fiancees is the opposite. I.E. Straight girl and another girl, or gay guy and a girl, etc.

Now maybe the person just didn't want to advertise their whole relationship, or the change in preference is a one off thing. However, it just doesn't seem that way.

The latest incident is a girl who for all intents and purposes I thought was straight. Who's preferences on facebook say she likes men. However, she is now apparently engaged to a girl we both went to school with. A girl that I am also rather sure is straight. However, there is an engagement ring being flaunted in photos. Then again, there are posts on the wall like "As your best friend I swear to always pretend to be your lesbian lover." and other such things. So I am 80% sure that it is just a joke, or a way for them to prevent getting hit on at bars, but 20% of me wonders if it's real. Though, again, a lot of girls from back home joke around about being in relationships with other girls, when they are 100% straight. It's very confusing.

So I don't know how to respond. I don't want to laugh it off like a joke, only to find out it's real. Then, on the other hand, if I offer serious heartfelt congratulations she and many people from back home might get super offended that I took the whole thing seriously. I have considered just unfriending her, but I don't want it to look homophobic or something.

Honestly, if you don't want people to think something about you, maybe don't post it on facebook. I know the best thing to do is ignore it, but it's so annoying. How are you supposed to stay connected with people if others keep making up BS news. So confusing and annoying.

Update I checked with a mutual friend and she confirmed it was a joke. I am officially pissed off.

[Ginger Tea]

How much of the "so we don't get hit on" part might apply to facebook too?
I hardly use the thing and have no idea what it's for save for being sent allerts that someone has shared some lovey dovey ecard image or some such shite.

In pubs and clubs I can see it as being a normal accourance even gay guys being a girls date for the night just so she don't get harrassed.

Hell me and a mate did that in the late 90's during the Manchester Gay and Lesbian mardigra, he was invited by a lesbian coworker or friend (can't remember) who had recently ended her relationship but also didn't want to get hit on too much and he was a meat sheild.
He was OK with going, but also didn't want any attention himself being straight and asked me along as his boyfriend, so if either of us got hit on we would just point at the other and say "sorry I'm with my boyfriend." I was wearing a split up the front dress and neon-red wig as I had cut/shaved my hair around the time and pointed to him god knows how many times, hell there was one guy who was crushed and kept eyeing me all night.

Didn't help in the end, mate had said we had come back from Amsterdam after getting married so when I was having a piss some random guy asks if he can kiss the bride (ie me) I see mate in corner laughing.
"OK but no tounge" and I see a camera flash from the corner of my eye.

[the_std]

I know the best thing to do is ignore it, but it's so annoying. How are you supposed to stay connected with people if others keep making up BS news. So confusing and annoying.

I checked with a mutual friend and she confirmed it was a joke. I am officially pissed off.

I am constantly baffled how people take things like Facebook uber-seriously. I could understand being confused if this was a person you talk to on a regular basis and they hadn't mentioned anything to you about the engagement. But Facebook is not the be-all end-all repository of factual information.

If you really want to keep in touch and are so concerned about her life, why don't you just ask her? "Hey, so, Facebook says you're engaged to So-And-So! How is that going?" But to be so mad and annoyed by people you likely never talk to changing information you'll never talk to them about on some website seems like a waste of mental energy to me.

[HYHYBT]

An online community is an odd place to express the view that communication's occuring through a website, by itself, means you shouldn't think about it or take it seriously even to wonder whether it's true or not.

[AmbrosiaWriter]

I think a forum online community like this is different than a Facebook community.

For me - personally - the only people on my friends list - on Facebook - are those who I know in real life/personally, so I know their kind of humor and what kind of antics to expect from them.

If I see an engagement pop up on my news feed, just looking at the names instantly tells me if it is a real engagement or a "lawl we have a silly waifu-waifu relationship."

With the people here (and on CS) I have some hints of their style of humor, but I am not certain I will ever truly know them well enough to be able to predict their intentions behind certain posts/phrases/statements. We don't do this on purpose, but on forums we tend to have a face on that we don't always hold when we're interacting with people face-to-face.

Not saying that everyone online are fakers, but there are certain bits of personality that tend to either not show or we don't want to show.

An exception I can think of is Jester, who just lets his very interesting, and broad personality bash you full force through the Interwebs. At least we know he's an awesome guy.

[protege]

Not saying that everyone online are fakers, but there are certain bits of personality that tend to either not show or we don't want to show.

Unfortunately, there are quite a few fakes on the 'net. Some people enjoy telling a good yarn, and think that the net makes them anonymous. Eventually, their stories get more and more bizarre...as they attempt to cover their ass. Then things fall apart, and people get pissed. That's why I don't get so worked up about things.