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People Need to Stop Dying

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  • People Need to Stop Dying

    I'm at that weird stage in life known as the mid-20s. A lot of life events going on. My friends are settling into adulthood, getting full-time jobs in their desired career, people moving out onto their own. Lots of engagements, weddings, even babies (shudder). And then we have funerals. A couple people I went to high school with died within a year of graduating high school. A friend's dad died in his late 40s from a sudden heart attack no one saw coming. Then they it finally got personal when my grandfather died the week before my junior year of college. That was it for a while. Then I turned 26. So far this year:

    My uncle who has had cancer on and off for the past three years finally passed away. It was a long week of watching him suffer with severe dementia and pain. I was the last person he managed a coherent conversation with. It wasn't unexpected but it still hurt like hell.

    Two weeks ago, someone I went to school with lost his 13 month fight with cancer. 26 is too young to be have been going through that and die from it.

    Yesterday, on my way to work, my mom called me and opened the conversation with, "I've got bad news." A close family-friend died Thursday. It was the end of the day at work when he suddenly didn't feel well. He called one of his sons up and told him he needed a ride to the ER cause something was wrong. He died of a heart attack before he could be treated. I've known him since forever. Managed a local gas station, once I was old enough to drive I was always able to take my car to him for repairs because I'd never get screwed. He wouldn't charge for labor and would only charge for parts with no markup for profit. He was an honest to goodness good man and you just can't find that in people these days.

    I'm sick of it. It was a beyond shitty week before I got that call Friday morning and after getting another medical bill today along with notice that my rent is going up after my lease gets renewed. I can't take it anymore.
    Violence has resolved more conflicts than anything else. The contrary opinion that violence doesn't solve anything is merely wishful thinking at its worst. - Starship Troopers

  • #2
    GD, I hear ya. I know a few people that have died in the last couple of years.

    I'm in my late-30s and some of my classmates have died. Some have been killed as a result of the drug trade (either overdosing or because they didn't pay their dealer), a couple were killed in auto accidents, and I know of at least one who killed herself.

    Some of you know that I lost my grandmother back in 2010. She died after a stroke earlier that year. She'd already lost her mind, and had been confined to a wheelchair. From what I understand, the last 2 years of her life were very painful. Now I'm watching my other grandmother (also my *last* living grandparent) wither away to nothing. Her health is rapidly failing, and after several falls (including one that she broke her neck ), is now in a nursing home...and the end is coming soon.

    Then there was a guy I knew from the MG club. He was killed while riding his motorcycle. Seems he was on the back roads near the river, somehow ended up on the CSX tracks near McKees Rocks, and was hit by an oncoming train. Turns out his family owned the guitar shop in West Elizabeth, and he had an orange GT like mine. Didn't know him very well, but he was a nice guy.

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    • #3
      My maternal grandmother passed away in Hong Kong three years ago. I didn't go because I have a big fear of flying. About two years earlier, my sister's father-in-law died from a long-fought battle with lung cancer.

      Now, my sister and her husband are watching his mother closely. She had shadows in her lungs before, and got treatment, but she has them again. FIL smoked, so I suspect that MIL must have got it from him.

      The best part about funerals is that you only have one once, as opposed to weddings and babies. So unless your best friends are zombies and ghosts, you don't have to go to their funerals again and again.

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      • #4
        Well, yes, but with weddings and births you don't usually have fewer friends and family after each.
        "My in-laws are country people and at night you can hear their distinctive howl."

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        • #5
          Yeah, it's getting pretty rough, man.

          I've already lost more than a handful of classmates from both schools I went to, and I'm only one summer away from my 10 year reunion (oh God that just hurt to say. Anyone got a Percocet?)...

          Most to car crashes. The other due to a house fire.

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          • #6
            Our 20th reunion would be past if anyone'd organized one, and I only know of four people I went to school with who have died, and only two of them I knew fairly well. (Those were only a couple years after graduation; one of the others was in 10th grade and the other a few months ago.)
            "My in-laws are country people and at night you can hear their distinctive howl."

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            • #7
              Aw, Greenday, that's rough, losing so many people. I've lost a lot of family members and friends, too.

              In 1990, my great-aunt, dad and grandmother died in that order within six months. In 2003, my other grandmother, Dad's cousin who was like an uncle to me and a good friend of mine all died within a month of each other. My uncles are struggling with various illnesses, and I suspect there will be more funerals in the near future.
              People behave as if they were actors in their own reality show. -- Panacea
              If you're gonna be one of the people who say it's time to make America great again, stop being one of the reasons America isn't great right now. --Jester

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              • #8
                To top it all off, one of my dogs had a stroke last night. Shit just keeps piling up.
                Violence has resolved more conflicts than anything else. The contrary opinion that violence doesn't solve anything is merely wishful thinking at its worst. - Starship Troopers

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by HYHYBT View Post
                  Well, yes, but with weddings and births you don't usually have fewer friends and family after each.
                  Sorry about that. It was tactless of me.

                  Perhaps next time, try making friends with younger people. Maybe even much younger, but not younger than the age of majority, of course, just to be safe! You get to be the Cool Old Guy/Lady to them, and chances are, you won't outlive them either.

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                  • #10
                    I am not witnessing many deaths, but I feel like everyone I know is in the process of losing someone. It sucks. My friend's going to another state to see his mom just one last time. She has terminal cancer and has clearly entered the last stage of living (not eating, sleeping all day, etc). My heart just breaks. I made him cry Sunday, didn't mean to.

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                    • #11
                      Well, it was a nice break. Put my one dog down a few weeks ago.

                      My uncle also died last night from liver failure.
                      Violence has resolved more conflicts than anything else. The contrary opinion that violence doesn't solve anything is merely wishful thinking at its worst. - Starship Troopers

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                      • #12
                        My friend's boyfriend died of a massive heart attack while I was still living with my sister. My mom and I took her out to dinner as a way to console her.

                        Another friend of mine lost a family member too. I think it was her dad. And another friend's mom is now living in a nursing home.

                        My only grandmother has cataracts in her eyes and needs very bright lights in order to play mahjongg with her friends. My dad told me that she seemed to be a bit slow in understanding stuff. She has maids to help her take care of her needs, though.

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                        • #13
                          My druggie uncle died. We aren't sure what did it, but it seems like he did have pancreatic cancer, so it was probably that. He was one of those guys who couldn't beat his drug addictions.

                          At least he died in his sleep though.

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                          • #14
                            I went through a stretch like that in my teens, 9 family members(including step-dad and bio dad) and my boyfriend within 13 months-I was not in good shape.
                            Registered rider scenic shore 150 charity ride

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