I Don't Get It (Differences Between Friend/Boyfriend)

[BlaqueKatt]

Nope. I've been meaning to go to the LGBT group at KVCC, but can't afford the gas. I saw this really really cute girl that I can't stop thinking about, but I have to, because I couldn't really make myself go up to her and just say "you're the most gorgeous person I've ever seen"
Especially not knowing if she was gay or not.

Hey, there is *nothing* wrong with telling another human they're beautiful, I do it regularly to both males and females. And I'm taken.

If they aren't interested they usually just take it as a compliment and it makes their day, too much nastiness in the world to not spread a bit of nice around.

[gremcint]

I'm sorry I stopped reading part way through the conversation because he was creeping me out a little.

you are the first girl I have ever met that I would consider my intulectual equal
D: your by far the only girl I know that I can have an intellegent conversation with and I find that more attactive then anything else in the world

D: how can you be the judge of that? And besides, when is the relationship ever fair for the guy :P

D: I do not need sex, and who knows, maybe I could be atractive to you in that way, time does funny things

to me these are some red flags, also the conversation starts about you and ends up being about him.

[Stitchwitch]

D: I do not need sex, and who knows, maybe I could be atractive to you in that way, time does funny things

This makes it sound like he thinks that he can "cure" you and make you like guys. Be very careful, he might try to pressure you more.

[CooperArt]

I'm just going to dump the conversation here. I'm C, for Cooper.

D: yikes, that sucks, and that is uderstandable...sooo....have you..found anyone?
C: Nope. I've been meaning to go to the LGBT group at KVCC, but can't afford the gas. I saw this really really cute girl that I can't stop thinking about, but I have to, because I couldn't really make myself go up to her and just say "you're the most gorgeous person I've ever seen"
C: Especially not knowing if she ewas gay or not.
D: lol i'd do it for you :P
D: I have a question for you, would you ever been in a polyamerous relationship?
C: probably not. no
D: another question too, are you exclusively looking for a female to be with?
C: Pretty much. I have a crush on a guy but he's 14... so that's a big no no
D: oh cause...well to expresive some represed feeling of mine...."you're the most gorgeous person I've ever seen"
D: xD
C: they haven't really been repressed
D: I've been hiding from you for most the summer :/
C: I just assumed we were drifting apart. HAs happened with a lot of my friends lately.
D: no, it was a self imposed seperation, I have depression issues and I hide from my negitiving feelings beause of it
D: I really really like and respect you
C: I'm pretty familiar with deression. Been diagnosed with it.
D: you are the first girl I have ever met that I would consider my intulectual equal
D: your by far the only girl I know that I can have an intellegent conversation with and I find that more attactive then anything else in the world
C:
D: and beside, I can promise you, if there ever came a time were you wanted to be with a girl, either testing or serious, I would let you....I just really want to make you happy, and I know I could make you thehappiest girlfriend in the world
C: I don't think I'm ready to get into a relationship. I don't know if I'll ever be, honestly.
D: you'll never know until you try, give me a chance and I promise you I will make sure you wont regret it
C: Look, my last relationships didn't end well.
C: My first boyfriend abused me. I abused my second.
D: I know, you told me before and I remember, I promise that I would never abuse you ever and I promise you that I will also have a backbone and call you out on abusing me. I understand that you have had problems with relationships in the past, but you'll never be happy if you let it bring you down and stop you from at least trying. You have perfect imperfections
C: It wouldn't be fair to you.
D: how can you be the judge of that? And besides, when is the relationship ever fair for the guy :P
C: Well, I am gay. It's nothing really to do with you, but sexually I'm just not attracted to you. Relationships have three components, and we can't have a healthy one if 1/3rd of the triangle is missing.
D: I do not need sex, and who knows, maybe I could be atractive to you in that way, time does funny things
C: I'm happy with just being friends. Close friends is fine, but friends is as far as I want this to go.
D: your not even gonna give me a chance?
C: I am. Just not in the way you want me to. You're a really sweet guy, and I think you're smart, and you like al ot of the same things I do. I value that in my friends. But a boyfriend without sex is just a friend, imo.
D: no, a boyfriend with out sex is the most loving and caring pilliow you'll ever have, one that listens to you, care about you and is always there for you.....with, if you want to of corse, the ocasional kiss
C: That's the thing. I don't even want to kiss. As I said, I just want to be friends. Close friends is fine. But this is unlikely to be the sort of situation where if you gain enough xp, you level up to boyfriend.
D: name one other guy, no person for that matter, that laughed as hard as me at that joke
D: I just.................nevermind, I'm done, you decided, if that makes you happy then so be it
C: I appreciate you respecting my decision. Can we still be friends?
C: I respect that this isn't the greatest position to put you in, but as I've said, I don't really want to lose you, but I know I'm not ready to upgrade any relationship.
Dakerman is now Away.
C: Ok, I'll leave you to think about it. I'm going to go to bed. I have work in the morning.
D is now Online.
D: i....guess we can still be friends....

Do you think he's honestly going to give up? I really want to be friends with him, as I think he's funny, we like a lot of the same things, and I don't nearly have enough friends, but as I've pointed out in the story I'm:

* About a 4 on the Kinsey scale--it's about as gay as you can get without going Full Gay (I've only been attracted to three guys in my lifetime... the 14-year-old, and two fictional characters: Ulfric from Skyrim--just the voice, not the personality--and Ranger from the Stephanie Plum series.)

* Not ready for a relationship: I've got Major Depressive Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and Panic Disorder. I'm in therapy and my medication needs to be adjusted again.

* and he doesn't know this, but I'm genderqueer. I don't know if I'm uncomfortable enough with my gender to go full trans, but either way, he wouldn't really be dating a "girl."

I just don't know if he's going to see reason. In about a week we're going to see a movie--with my sister in tow--and how he behaves himself will say a lot.