Lawmaker says women should plan ahead in case of rape

[RecoveringKinkoid]

A lot of women who have never been pregnant think as you do. In fact, when I was younger, so did I.

If you've never been pregnant, I assure you that you have not "already made" the decision. Things get "real" when you're pregnant, and it's no longer hypothetical or academic at that point.

I'm not making light of your conviction, I'm just saying that when you are actually pregnant, things are not as they appeared before you were.

Lawmakers trying to add turmoil and angst and confusion to what is already usually a gut wrenching, highly personal decision to further their own agenda is disgusting and misogynistic.

[Rageaholic]

I very much doubt that the decision to abort is ever a "careless decision." If I were to become pregnant, I would have no qualms about aborting, since I have had almost two decades to think about whether I want children and what I would do if I became pregnant. This is something I think about every time I am around a child and every time someone mentions abortion. It is not a decision made lightly, but it is a decision I have already made, so I could act upon that decision immediately after discovering I was pregnant.

I don't know if my insurance covers abortions, but that has not factored into my decision.

Sadly, many of the prolifers and religious fucknuts think that everyone who has an abortion is just an evil baby killer who doesn't care about anyone else. Like many issues, they see it in black and white, failing to take into account the situation.

I could start an entirely different rant on their close mindedness towards these common issues (abortion, divorce, gay marrage). Instead of trying to understand the situation, they just assume "OMG abortion! Sinner!". Sure they may be perfect little christians who never screw up, but they fail at compassion toward their fellow man.

[Ghel]

If you've never been pregnant, I assure you that you have not "already made" the decision. Things get "real" when you're pregnant, and it's no longer hypothetical or academic at that point.

I'm not making light of your conviction, I'm just saying that when you are actually pregnant, things are not as they appeared before you were.

This sound suspiciously like the things my female relatives responded with when I told them I didn't want to have children. "I can't stand being around children," I said. "It's different when they're yours." [To which I wanted to shout, "Yeah, I can't hand them back to their parents!"] "I don't have the patience," I said. "You'll learn it quick." "I enjoy my life the way it is," I said. "You're being selfish."

I realize that people (including myself) can change, but I very much doubt I could ever change my mind on this. I have a ton of respect for people who consciously choose to have children and make every effort to raise them in such a way that they grow up to be healthy, happy, well-rounded individuals. But I would never want to burden a child with having me for a mother.

[Hyena Dandy]

they may be perfect little christians who never screw up, but they fail at compassion toward their fellow man.

Which means that they're terrible, terrible Christians...

Being a Christian without compassion is missing the entire point.

[linguist]

This sound suspiciously like the things my female relatives responded with when I told them I didn't want to have children.

i don't think she meant it anything like that. the way i read it was more theory vs. reality.

example, by all accounts my mom never wanted kids. everyone i've talked to who knew her when she was younger says she swore she'd never have them, she'd make a horrible mother, she liked her life, she'd get an abortion if she ever got pregnant, and so on and so on and so on.

then she found herself unexpectedly pregnant with me.

when faced with reality of being a mother vs. the theory of never wanting kids, she found she felt differently. she couldn't go through getting an abortion, and she's since been pretty much the best mom anyone could ask for, despite her reservations about herself.

personally, i've often found that those who swear they'd make horrible parents make the best parents, because they care enough about their parenting skills to actually consider them, rather than assuming everything they do is right because they are "great parents."

[RecoveringKinkoid]

I'm not saying you'd change your mind or suddenly love the idea of being a parent.

What I'm saying is that it's never an easy decision. Even if you think now that you know what you'd do, you never really do. About anything major, really. I dont' think anyone does until they are really faced with the reality of it.

Couple that with the fact that when you're pregnant and all full of crazy hormones that affect your thinking, you can't say with absolute certainty what you'd do or how you'd feel. That's all I'm saying.

[Eisa]

I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him.

*cough* Sorry about that...


My views on abortion now are...if my bf got me pregnant, I would not have an abortion. I don't WANT kids, but I don't think I could have an abortion in that instance. Whether or not we kept the child is a different story.

If my rapist had gotten me pregnant, you bet your fucking ass I would have gotten an abortion. It's that or looking at 2 deaths 'cause I would have killed myself rather than have that bastard's kid. Not even joking.

[insertNameHere]

Eisa, 3 deaths, you might as well kill that fucker if your on your way out.

My ex got raped, she won't tell me or any of her marine friends who it was, just that it happened as she knows that guy who have a very hard rest of his life, short or living crippled. It is a great county we live in where the rapist is likely to get a slap on the wrist, and you would be tried for murder if you went to get a back alley abortion, or even travel out of state or country.

I guess some places want legislation against being able to travel elsewhere. I get wanting to make sure the woman knows what she is doing, but in a case of rape, wanting her to have insurance is just plain fucked up. Along with the associated costs of carrying the baby and getting checkups, somehow I think those cost more than getting an abortion.

[Eisa]

I was up for that, too, I still think of elaborately implausible revenge scenarios...

But yeah. I still feel kinda bad because I encouraged my sister to report her rapist [her ex and her baby daddy ], y'know like YES you should report, he can't get away with it...

Yeah, they didn't even charge him. Or arrest him. He admitted in writing it was non-consensual. My whole family is still pissed about that one.

And yes, baby care costs a fuck-ton more than an abortion. Not being cavalier about abortion--I doubt except in extreme circumstances I could do that--but I don't think I have the right to take that choice away from anyone else.

[Ghel]

--but I don't think I have the right to take that choice away from anyone else.

And that's the whole point, right? If a woman has the option of having an abortion, but chooses to give birth anyway, she's still making a choice. And these imbecilic "pro-lifers" want to take that choice away from her.