Worst Movies Ever

[ExRetailDrone]

I admit that I really liked some of the movies some of you have put on your lists (Inception, Despicable Me), but that's what's great about opinions

Now that I work at a video rental store, one perk I have is I get to take home movies for free before they street date. I have taken home some horrendous pieces of crap that I can't believe I actually sat through:

Dying God (the story could have been neat... maybe... with the right combination of movie-making magic, but it was so horribly low-budget that it was painful. And most of the acting sucked)

Legion: The Final Exorcism (I get a kick out of exorcism movies, and considering how many I've seen around the store lately it seems others do too. But this one was just gut-wrenchingly awful beyond words. Bad acting, horrible "special effects", sub-par plotline. There was really nothing going for it)

Stone (this one annoyed me because the three main actors in it are incredible - Edward Norton, Robert DeNiro, and Mila Jovovich - the story was just... crap)


I have also seen my fair share of awful movies throughout the years. I saw the original Piranha 2: The Spawning from the early 80s (Fun fact - did you know that James Cameron directed that monstrosity?) I was far from sober at the time and it didn't make it any less awful. My friends and I had decided to have a bad horror movie night, and boy did we pick some bad ones! Piranha 2 was basically about intelligent, flying, man-eating fish that would terrorize anyone who decided to get near the water. The over-the-top aspect was just too over-the-top even for me. Needless to say, when I first heard about the remake of Piranha, I wanted to run to Hollywood and make a toilet paper mummy out of whoever came up with the brilliant idea to bring that gem back. I will never subject myself to that remake.

I'm also curious... those of you who hated House of Wax, are you talking about the original with Vincent Price or the remake with Paris Hilton that I heard was practically unwatchable? I've never seen the remake because I refuse to watch any movie with Paris Hilton. I saw the original ages ago in old-school 3D and it was incredible. I really need to see that one again. Vincent Price was a master at his craft!

I'm sure I'll have more to add later... I've seen a lot of bad movies.

[Andara Bledin]

Oh, god, the horror of bad movies...

The one movie I despise with a passion and will tell everybody that the only part of it even worth letting near your television is the five minutes with Christopher Walken, which are pure gold, and yet not even remotely picking this movie up out of the gutter of self-involved, pseudo-intellectual psychobabble in which it drowns: The Addiction *retch* Damn, that piece of Mary Sue trash is so pretentious.

*takes a deep breath*

Ok. After that, there's a slew of movies I just don't care for, and the majority can be all lumped together under the tropes of Idiot Plot and Poor Communication Kills. Practically every situation comedy on TV, and most similar movies fall under this heading, unfortunately.

The boyfriend recently tried to watch Meet the Fockers, and even with my headphones on and trying to ignore the TV, I was getting irritated by the contrived nature of the basic plot.

^-.-^

[anakhouri]

I liked Zombie Strippers, at least the stripping parts. The boring socio-philosophical whatever parts were lame as Hell.

The Meat Eater
Devil Dynamite
Twilight
The Punisher (with Thomas Jane as Frank)

[Bloodsoul]

Obligatory:
Plan 9 From Outer Space
Manos: The Hands of Fate
The Room
Santa Claus Conquers The Martians

[Ladeeda]

Halloween remake (NO! Michael Myers does NOT have a motive! He is just EVIL!)
Yeti: a Love Story (you'd think a movie about a gay abominable snowman would be a Can't Miss)
The Haunting remake (OMG! The original had almost no special effects and produces NIGHTMARES! This was just crap)
The Phantom of the Opera with Gerard Butler (Christine can't act or sing, they swished a lot of the scenes around, Carlotta screwed up a few lines, the Masquerade dance was completely bland, and the Phantom's deformity was BOLLOCKS! Only good thing was the kickass sword fight in the graveyard.)

[blas87]

Splice was just....messed up. Would you believe me if I told you that my bf and I were gorging ourselves on pizza and cheesesticks while watching that gross movie?

[Gravekeeper]

Drag Me To Hell (this one I actually liked, but it was so over the top unbelievable that it wasn't even...well, believable. I mean, that movie was freaking NUTS, that old lady gave me nightmares and so did the goat, plus that girl killing her kitten just upset me)

That's the Raimi style. Half horror, half comedy. Scary yet still with a campiness too it. Not sure whether to scream or laugh. It happens every time 2-3 Raimi ( Sam, Ivan and/or Ted ) brothers combine on one movie ( Evil Dead 1/2, Army of Darkness ). Its not suppose to be believable, just fun. <3


That said, my recent litany of dissappointments from my last blu-ray safari:

Monsters ( Talk about a total bait and switch. Completely different movie than the trailers. Not a bad movie persay, but its not "Monsters" so much as "Hey you might hear a monster in the background once every 45 minutes". Also, horrifically unscientific on even the most primitive level. )

Splice ( Again, another fuck you to science. Cool effects. Story thats alternatively ridiculous or terrible uncomfortable for the viewer. Also, killed Rodney from Stargate Atlantis. Unforgivable. )

Despicable Me ( Why do I even bother watching anything animated that isn't from Pixar anymore )

I got more enjoyment out of the bluray extended cut of Terminator 2 the HMV clerk offered me for $8 as a bonus for spending over $20 in the store.

[blas87]

I liked the original Dumb and Dumber, that movie is one of those that cheers me up just when I need it (I had a really horrible work week one week, oh hell, any week, but this week was bad and they were playing D&D at the gym and it totally lifted my spirits to work out to that movie).

There are some other really *out there* movies, moreso low budget or straight to DVD, that I see at the movie store, and I just wonder if more people need to be institutionalized for their crazy ideas.

Did you mean The Rage, Carrie 2? Because I don't remember a remake of Carrie, in The Rage, Rachel is Carrie's half sister, her father being Ralph White who was also Carrie White's father. That movie sucked, though, I will agree with you on that.

[telecom_goddess]

Dumb and Dumber, and it's sequel
House of Wax for sure!
Zombie Strippers (can't believe this one even exists)
the remake of Carrie (leave good classic movies alone)
any asinine dumb comedy
Big (I can't stand seeing adults act childish)

[blas87]

Your very own list, whether you agree with the lists online that go by ticket/DVD sales or not.

Last night, The Village was on TV. I never saw it when it was new. WOW. What a horrible damn movie! I should have known, M Night Shymalan and all...just a horrible, horrible waste of time!

That, and in no particular order come the others. Most are because they were so terrible I fell asleep watching them, either at the theater or at home, or that I may have liked them, but they were just horrible acted or horribly done period.

The Happening (ZzzzzZzzzz)
Inception (ZzzzzZZzzzZzzzzLeoyouareretardedstopmakingmoviesZ zzzZzzz)
Shutter Island (What the fuck?ZzzzzzZzzzZzzz)
Summer's Moon (What is this?!?!?)
Texas Chainsaw Massacre, The Beginning
the newest Nightmare On Elm St (Just NO!!!)
Drag Me To Hell (this one I actually liked, but it was so over the top unbelievable that it wasn't even...well, believable. I mean, that movie was freaking NUTS, that old lady gave me nightmares and so did the goat, plus that girl killing her kitten just upset me)
Pathology
House Of Wax (I actually own this movie, it's so fucked up that no one can really like it. It's like a bad car accident, you can't help but watch)

And this one needs its own space. Pirhana. Saw it at the gym last week. WHAT THE FUCK? How did this movie ever even....I mean, who in their right mind would be in something this fucking stupid?!!?!?!? Digitally animated FISH that go around biting off guys' dicks? Everyone on spring break getting silly and then getting eaten by fish? REALLY? Officially the stupidest fucking movie and worst excuse called "film" I've ever seen. EVER.

Edit to add: Oh shit. There is going to be a sequel to that horrific nonsense.